I don’t want to tell you how to do your job or anything, but so far this protest against us has all the cohesiveness of a BM after a week long Guinness bender.
Number of times I’ve been accosted at home or work: zero.
Number of signs I have seen demonizing me: zero.
Number of people doing illegal drugs and fornicating outside my window right now: 4.
Seriously, in the immortal words of Mr. Hand: What are you people, on dope?
Please repeat aloud for those in the back of the TAH townsquare….
I also had a dream last night. A pink attired hippie was telling me about her dream. And Seabiscuit was licking my toes. Only, I looked down. And it was Sarah Jessica Parker.* And then I went to my dentist. And he buggered me with a porcupine penis. And I cried. But my tears made little unicorns. And they danced around the bed. And I woke up yelling “Who let all these damn unicorns into the room.” And my wife snored. My dogs looked at me and silently mouthed that I was a retard.
Then this morning. I woke up. I came to work. I even did my job. I also watched Stargate Continuum. That thing on Teal’c’s head must have hurt. Like getting a tick off your scrotum using a blow torch. [Wave your fingers in the air.]
*shamelessly stolen from The Family Guy
BTW- Just realized that the video is from our buddy Skye! /wave
UPDATE: This is why Ace is better than us…
Second, she has a nice body. It’s a real shame a decent body is capped by this unfortunate head. She looks like a young college-age Bill Walton skipped the NBA draft to pursue a Library Sciences degree, and alsom have gender reassignment surgery.
Mr. Alandt, 53, an out-of-work stagehand and one of hundreds participating in Phoenix’s version of Occupy Wall Street, is furious that people are dying in foreign wars. He is angry that medical marijuana was still considered illegal despite Arizona voters’ approval of it. He is livid about his lot in life.
“Bro, I have been lied to so many times that I don’t know who to believe,” Mr. Alandt said. “All the world’s problems run downhill, and I’m at the bottom.”
What is this world coming to when a stagehand can’t find a $75k a year job? This is bullshit. The poor man can’t even get high….
“Peace activists, indigenous rights activists, immigrant activists — they’re all here,” said Liz Hourican, 40, who belongs to the antiwar group Code Pink and was scrawling a message in pink chalk on a sidewalk in downtown Phoenix, calling on American troops to come home. “It may sound different to you, but it’s all the same. We’re all stepping up and saying something’s wrong.”
Also, rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists.
Kay Merryweather, 34, an artist on the Lower East Side, volunteers at Trinity Church, giving out food. She said that during the financial crisis, when banks were receiving bailouts and financial executives were receiving multimillion-dollar bonuses, the church often ran out before the long lines of working poor were fed. “The bankers were getting all of these millions,” Ms. Merryweather said. “And we didn’t have enough food.”
This entire thing makes me reconsider whether an artist is a good occupational choice. Glad I became a soldier, lobbyist and writer instead of going into penis puppetry. There but for the grace of God go I…
But not far away, Benny Zable, 66, a longtime activist, was protesting while wearing a gas mask and a suit that read “Work Consume Be Silent Die.” He said his outrage came from the heedlessness of economic growth. “It’s the greed factor,” Mr. Zable said.
I don’t think “Activist” as as lucrative as you’ve been led to believe by your guidance counselor.
In Boston, a hub of colleges and universities, a higher education theme emerged among protesters. “What did I spend the last four years doing?” asked Becky De Freitas, a recent graduate of Gordon College in Wenham, Mass. “Fluent in Mandarin and French and no one wants to go for that? And it’s like, now what?”
Dude, I don’t know why you haven’t thought of this, but maybe you should go back and get a graduate degree in Sanksrit.
Jean Marie Simpson, an actor and peace activist, objected when her fellow demonstrators at Occupy Tucson surrounded a man who had assailed the movement, shouting at him and thrusting signs in his face. “I left disappointed and disillusioned,” she said of her fellow occupiers.
But you are an actor, can’t you at least fake it for the Childrens sake?
Say what you will about the dirty smelly hippies of Occupy Indy, but man they work fast. 9 days ago they stated that:
“We at Occupy Indianapolis are gathering in FULL SUPPORT of the Occupy Wall Street movement in NYC.”
This is our initial statement, approved with full consensus on the ground at the statehouse in Indianapolis where our standing occupation is ongoing. Consensus is a gradual process, we will add to this statement (hopefully each night) as we come to consensus on the many issues which plague our nation and to which this movement seeks to respond through a creative and democratic process.
OK, strong start. I mean, is says absolutely nothing, but they were just starting. So now, after a week plus of contemplation, we get their magnum opus:
We are opening a dialogue for the education and empowerment of the populace about the socioeconomic injustices which permeate our society. We are here to get Corporations out of the American Political system. We are here in solidarity with the Global Occupy Movement. We are here to reclaim our Voice. We invite all people of peace to join us. We are Occupy Indianapolis.
Not to put too fine a point on it, but what in the hell does that mean? I could have spouted that nonsense 20 mins after the first missive, and I could have done it without deodorant deprived hippie douches waving their fingers in the air.
It just reminds me of Pippin and Merry at the Ent Moot, where like 4 days pass and then Treebeard announces that they have confabbed and agree that the Hobbits are not orcs. Really dude, can we speed this shit up a little?
On a totally unrelated note, I switched from World of Warcraft to Lord of the Rings Online, so if you could all alter your slams on me accordingly I would appreciate it. Tonight I am working on my farming and forrestry vocations, and Brown Neck Gaitor and Claymore will be crafting weapons and cooking. Good times, good times. If anyone cares to join, I think it is free, we are on Nimrodel server, and my name is Fennyferth.
[As always, photoshop thanks to the genius that is The Sniper.]
Day 1 in the books, and it is a 70/30 lead for Ballduster over Matthis, and 75/25 lead for Soupy over Hillar. Let’s see what today brings!
OK, this is probably going to get no one, but if there is anyone who knows anything about the Ketchikan Alaska area, and more specifically Prince of Wales Island, can you send me an email through Jonn at our Admin box? I am taking a work trip there in late Nov into early December. Probably going to add a day or three on one side or the other, and want to know if anyone has any ideas. (ie Travel on the shitty little airplane to the island, or take the boat. What to see etc.)
Anyway, if anyone lives in Alaska, has been to Alaska, knows how to spell Alaska, knows how to bake Alaska or thinks they once spent a night with an Inuit named Dolores in a Igloo, send me advice on what to do.
WARNING: Graphic language alert.
Been pissed all day that pack a day smoker of manpole, Rick Duncan has once again resurfaced. First it was his horseshit blog, with all it’s “Woe is me glory.”
So here I sit – in this Starbucks, in this city, in this life.
So here I sit – homeless, unemployed, mentally ill, addicted, reputation ruined by my own misdeeds.
So here I sit – and I am grateful to God for ALL of that. Sometimes.
When I am not grateful for ALL of that, I try to ask for the capacity to be grateful for ALL of that. Sometimes.
Yeah, well here I sit watching you fucking brutally murder the English language, literary elegance, and any propriety with regards to divinity. You write worse than Peter King, which is a transcendant compliment if you wanted to be the worst fucking author in the history of terrible fucking authors.
Then I find this assholes Twitter page. Bear in mind that this is a homeless grifter who screwed over every one of our brothers and sisters in arms who actually *were* wounded, and then explain to me why this rectal emission has the capability to Tweet every 3 minutes. I sincerely hope that every one of his followers is some asshole like me only watching it waiting for him to inevitably embrace a new identity and screw over a new group.
Then, to make it all the more vexxing, he answers my Tweets in some sort of manner that makes a shit hurling marmoset at the Bronx Zoo look erudite.
OK, so is this someone else using his Twitter, am I just talking to a fahkin moron, are the voices in his Tweet Deck getting to be too much for him? Just WTF?
NEW POSTS ARE BELOW, THIS IS STICKY’D TO TOP
OK, let’s get it on. I will bump and redo the page each day, which will allow you to vote once per day. Total for the week wins.
Game 1:
OK, so in matchup one we have Ballduster McSoulpatch versus the Baskin Robbins Ranger. One is a Brig Gen in the CIA with a penchant for standing around naked with men in East German uniforms, and the other is a douche who goes into the high schools and lies to the kids.
Game 2:
Game 2 features Soup Sandwich against the Real Liam Neeson. One is a three-CIB-Wearing Air Force super commando who thinks the RTB didn’t show him enough love, and the other is a man who grew fairly wealthy by convincing people his daughter was kidnapped for the sex trade, and he went and killed them all.
Perhaps a refresher course:
