Category: Dumbass Bullshit

  • Just When You Thought the Army’s Uniform Games Had Ended . . .

    . . . it turns out that’s not the case.

    According to the Army Times, the Army has announced that, because of adoption of the new Operational Camouflage Pattern, additional new uniform items will be required. Specifically, soldiers will need new boots, t-shirts, and belts to go with the new camouflage uniforms.

    Now, maybe new boots make sense; the desert tan boots used with the ACU were somewhat lighter than the new OCP.  The new boots are coyote brown.

    But new T-shirts and belts are just stupid, at least if they’re going to be mass-issued gratis.  What, has RIT quit making freaking dye?  And a new belt?  C’mon, folks – the belt isn’t even freaking visible.  The only time it’s seen is when you take off the jacket.  And if you’re taking off the jacket in combat, well, I think that means you’ve got worse problems than a mismatched belt.

    But I guess the DA part of the Five-Sided Asylum had to find something for some of its staff to work on.  This must have been really important.

    The Army Times article has more details.  It’s worth reading – unless you are having high blood pressure problems today.  Then maybe you might want to wait a while.

    One of those details:  the new OCP isn’t designed to be “universal”.   Jungle and desert variants will soon be announced.  I bet at least one of those will need “new boots, t-shirts, and belts” too.

    Sheesh.  GMAFB.

  • NDtBF says you can’t use his name

    NDtBF says you can’t use his name

    The current tyrant of North Korea Kim Jong Un (known around here as Needle D*ck the Bug F**ker) has determined that his name is too important for the other kids to have according to the link sent to us by Pinto Nag from MSN;

    North Korea has ordered people who share the name of leader Kim Jong Un to change their names, South Korea’s state-run KBS television reported on Wednesday.

    North Korea imposed similar bans on the use of the names of its two former leaders, Kim’s father, Kim Jong Il, and grandfather, Kim Il Sung, as part of propaganda drives to build cults of personality around them.

    Kim Jong Un’s name is not allowed for newborns and people who share the name must not just stop using it but must change it on their birth certificates and residence registrations, KBS reported, citing an official North Korean directive.

    So, there you go.

  • Shawn Parcells; CNN’s forensics expert’s creds questioned

    Shawn Parcells; CNN’s forensics expert’s creds questioned

    Shawn Parcells

    Andy11M sends us a link to The Daily Caller which reports that CNN’s go-to forensics expert in the Michael Brown/Ferguson case isn’t who he says he is, and he doesn’t have the credentials that he says he has. Now, I don’t watch CNN, I haven’t since they ran that report of the military using chemical agents to kill defectors to the North Vietnamese in the late 90s. But apparently they used this Shawn Parcells pretty extensively;

    Parcells appeared on all of the major cable TV networks, but showed up most frequently on CNN. He was interviewed multiple times on Anderson Cooper 360, and by Jake Tapper and Ashleigh Banfield. He also made at least two appearances on HLN with Nancy Grace.

    But in its investigation, the very same network that cited Parcells so often found that he had embellished his academic background and that he conducted a 2012 autopsy in Missouri without a licensed pathologist present.

    He even made up the term that CNN used to lend credibility to his reportage – a Forensic Pathologist Assistant. Of course, in true pretender fashion, Purcells blames CNN for not checking his creds;

    Despite ample public evidence against Parcells, he told TheDC that when he was making the rounds on the TV circuit to discuss the Brown autopsy, networks never asked about his professional past.

    “I was expecting them to ask, but they never did,” Parcells said.

    Like I’ve been saying since we started busting the anti-war phonies here, it’s more important what the fakers are saying than what are the source’s credentials for saying that stuff. The media is more interested in making news than reporting it.

  • Infowars: Delta Force in Ferguson

    Infowars: Delta Force in Ferguson

    Delta Force Operator

    I posted this story on our Facebook page last night and it’s totally credible, if you you’re not that bright. But the fellow pictured above is supposed to be a member of Delta Force according to some fellow reporting for InfoWars who claims that he was an Army staff sergeant. I don’t think that anyone would mistake Chunky Cheese for a Delta operator, but, oh well;

    Report: Army Special Forces in Ferguson For Verdict

    Men outfitted in suspicious attire appear to provide security for courthouse

    Members of a covert military outfit, most likely U.S. Army Delta Force, have been spotted outside the Clayton, Mo., courthouse where a grand jury is convening to decide whether or not to indict a Ferguson police officer.

    Infowars reporters on Saturday spotted several men outfitted in suspicious attire and wearing ear pieces in the parking lot of the Clayton courthouse.

    Former Army Staff Sergeant and Infowars reporter Joe Biggs, who has carried out multiple tours of duty in Iraq and Afghanistan, reports that the men appeared to be undercover operatives, possibly from Delta Force, due to the way they conducted themselves and their inconspicuous attire.

    The operatives arrived in Ferguson in vehicles with North Carolina license plates, which is interesting because Delta Force is stationed in Fort Bragg, North Carolina.

    delta force fatty

    I’m thinking that Joe Biggs never left his B-hut. I’m not sure what “suspicious attire” is, but I’m guessing that it means those clothes that folks buy online from Ranger Joe’s. And the “earpieces” are nothing more than Bluetooth that every self-important prick wears these days.

    So all you need to make people believe that you’re a member of the Army’s elite Delta Force is to drive an SUV with North Carolina plates and wear a Bluetooth ear bud. And look like you’ve been living on MacDonald’s takeout exclusively for a few years. You’ll probably need a scruffy beard, too.

    Believe it or not, at least one person shared our Facebook link last night as a warning to his friends in Missouri that Delta was going to get them.

  • Yes, Virginia, there was no Sandy Hook

    In the spirit of the season of giving thanks, Veterans Today released the wonderful news that no one died two years ago at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Yes, I know it’s hard to believe, but the same folks who have proved to us that there was no Holocaust, that aliens are making our foreign policy, that Osama bin Laden was dead long before 9/11, make their case for this;

    Now for the First Time in a long time, VT can report Major Breaking GOOD NEWS for all to get really excited about.

    The major breaking GOOD NEWS which the CMMM refuses to cover (for reasons to be explained later) is the recent research and 100% rock solid findings by Professor James Fetzer, Wolfgang Halbig and other research associates on SANDY HOOK.

    Yes, there were No Dead Kids and No Dead Teachers at Sandy Hook, None at all as in ZERO!

    Their findings conclusively show that there were NO DEAD KIDS at Sandy Hook, none at all, not even one. That’s right No Dead Kids, but also it can now be conclusively proved in a Court of Law that not only were there No Dead Kids, but there were NO DEAD TEACHERS either, none at all, not even one.

    No Dead Lanzas either.

    And there is also some substantial evidence that there were NO DEAD LANZAS, that is, no Dead so-called Shooter Adam Lanza and no dead Nancy Lanza either, his so-called mother. In fact there is substantial reason to believe that Adam Lanza or Nancy Lanza never even existed at all and were virtual creations as part of one of the greatest Psyops in history ever perpetrated on the American Public.

    Not the greatest however which is now known to be the False-Flag attack on America on 9/11/01 which was initiated to create the false narrative needed to justify illegal, Unconstitutional, unprovoked, undeclared, un-winnable, perpetual wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

    So, to celebrate the news, I’m giving away all the guns and ammunition that I bought after Sandy Hook.

  • Amy Rising; Pot head wants free pot from VA

    Amy Rising; Pot head wants free pot from VA

    Amy Rising

    What else is new right? Well, the Washington Post chose former Airman Amy Rising to represent the former military people who are now pot heads in order to influence the VA to pay for their pot;

    Every morning, former Air Force senior airman Amy Rising makes breakfast for her second-grader, drives him to school and returns home to prepare what she calls her medicine.

    She suffers from severe anxiety after four years working in the frenetic global command center at Scott Air Force Base in Illinois, providing logistical and support services for bombings and other missions in Iraq and Afghanistan.

    […]

    Although Rising did not serve in Afghanistan or Iraq, she said the pressure of her work was intense. “What was really hard about working in command was never being able to see the damage you did on the ground,” she said. “You start to think about all the orphans and widows you created, and that you do hit civilians.”

    Yeah, sure. I’m not saying that there isn’t a legitimate purpose for the use of marijuana to treat brain injury victims or maybe PTS, I’m not a neurologist, but I can spot a malingerer correctly 10 out of 10 times, and that’s what I’m thinking Ms. Rising does for a living. It does take a measure of courage to try and use such a weak story for her “severe anxiety”, though.

    She reminds me of Wayward Bill Chenglis, the pot advocate in Colorado who pretended to be a Vietnam veteran who needed marijuana to treat his PTS from being a clerk in Germany.

  • Jesse Ventura; conscientious objector

    Jesse Ventura; conscientious objector

    Jesse Ventura's big fucking mouth

    Fresh from his triumphant court appearance where he sued a widow for millions of dollars, Jesse Ventura or Jimmy Janos, whichever you prefer, a Navy veteran takes time out of his busy life to feed the Ron Paulians by declaring that he would be a conscientious objector if he had to serve today;

    “I hate to say it, but no, I would be a contentious objector today. I don’t believe that the military fights for our freedom,” Ventura said.

    Well, good for him. Ya know there are a lot of things that Jimmy “believes” that aren’t true. And he runs through most of them in the video at the link. Of course, the only people who believe Janos are people who would never get off their couches for any reason anyway and Janos just gives them reason to continue their sedentary lifestyle.

    He continues that veterans and troops are honorable people, but I’m sure that part of it goes right over the Paulians’ heads.

  • David Masciotra: you don’t protect me

    David Masciotra: you don’t protect me

    David Masciotra

    David Masciotra, you know, one of those stank-ass hipster doofuses who thinks he has something worthwhile to say about veterans and actively serving troops vomits on to the pages of Salon to lecture the American people on how much he is ungrateful that American troops are responsible for the environment in which he lives, you know, an environment that allows him to criticize those defenders of his freedoms – not just troops, but he’s not grateful for the cops, either;

    Put a man in uniform, preferably a white man, give him a gun, and Americans will worship him. It is a particularly childish trait, of a childlike culture, that insists on anointing all active military members and police officers as “heroes.” The rhetorical sloppiness and intellectual shallowness of affixing such a reverent label to everyone in the military or law enforcement betrays a frightening cultural streak of nationalism, chauvinism, authoritarianism and totalitarianism, but it also makes honest and serious conversations necessary for the maintenance and enhancement of a fragile democracy nearly impossible.

    It has become impossible to go a week without reading a story about police brutality, abuse of power and misuse of authority. Michael Brown’s murder represents the tip of a body pile, and in just the past month, several videos have emerged of police assaulting people, including pregnant women, for reasons justifiable only to the insane.

    It is equally challenging for anyone reasonable, and not drowning in the syrup of patriotic sentimentality, to stop saluting, and look at the servicemen of the American military with criticism and skepticism.

    Yeah, douchenugget, it’s not the uniform that makes folks worthy of respect and a measure of adulation, it’s what the uniform says about the person wearing it and their commitment to the ideals that they are defending. Anyone can buy a uniform and put it on – our Stolen Valor page is chocked full of people who do that. Those spazwads do it because the uniformed services are the last government institutions which accomplish that for which they were created.

    I like how he added in the “preferably white man” in there, as if he’s not a white man. I’m pretty sure that Liberals don’t know they’re white.

    Masciotra claims that there is a “sexual assault epidemic in the military”. He doesn’t mention that a woman on a college campus is more likely to be assaulted than a woman on a military base. Masciotra recently graduated from college, so I wonder how many women he raped.

    He refers to that tired-ass survey that the stank-ass hippies all use for proof that 1/3 of women in the military are assaulted. The folks who did the poll sent out tens of thousands of inquiries to women who had been in the military, they got a few hundred back and 1/3 of those few hundred said they’d been raped – does that sound a bit unscientific to anyone? But it says what the David Milquetoasts of the world want to hear, so, the veracity of the poll doesn’t come into question.

    Chelsea Manning, now serving time in prison as a whistle-blower, uncovered multiple incidents of fellow soldiers laughing as they murdered civilians. Keith Gentry, a former Navy man, wrote that when he and his division were bored they preferred passing the time with the “entertainment” of YouTube videos capturing air raids of Iraq and Afghanistan, often making jokes and mocking the victims of American violence.

    O-o-o-h. Chilling. I’m pretty sure that there are just as many college and high school students who are doing the same thing when they should be studying. Facebook is full of those videos and not everyone watching them are in the military. I’ll bet Chelsea Manning did a bit of war-pron viewing himself.

    Wars that are not heroic have no real heroes, except for the people who oppose those wars. Far from being the heroes of recent wars, American troops are among their victims. No rational person can blame the soldier, the Marine, the airman, or the Navy man for the stupid and destructive foreign policy of the U.S. government, but calling them “heroes,” and settling for nothing less, makes honest and critical conversations about American foreign policy less likely to happen. If all troops are heroes, it doesn’t make much sense to call their mission unnecessary and unjust. It also makes conversations about the sexual assault epidemic, or the killing of innocent civilians, impossible. If all troops are heroes, it doesn’t make any sense to acknowledge that some are rapists and sadists.

    The same principle of clear-eyed scrutiny applies to law enforcement agencies. Police departments everywhere need extensive investigation of their training methods, qualifications for getting on the job, and psychological evaluation. None of that will happen as long as the culture calls cops heroes, regardless of their behavior.

    Again, Dave, who is silencing your criticism? There you are, on Salon, criticizing the troops and the police and I suspect that no one is kicking down your front door to haul you off to one of our famous gulags where you’ll be tortured and punished for expressing your opinion.

    What he’s really afraid of is being scrutinized for being the weak, intellectually dishonest creepy-looking milksop who can’t see anything worth a little inconvenience in his own life. Mr. Milquetoast wants everyone to get the impression that he’s a hero because he speaks his mind, but what is heroic about evacuating his bowels in the pages of Salon when he’s just toeing the stank-ass hippie/hipster dufus party line. Maybe in his crowd he’s brave, but to the rest of the country, he’s just another motormouth dingus with a rat stuck to his face. I’ll bet he wears a ball cap backwards, too. By the way, look who Dave does think is a hero.

    In these dark days, this country needs heroes and they ain’t gonna turn to the David Milquetoasts.

    Thanks to Ann for the link.