Author: TSO

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H/t HotAir

Even were I not dating one of them, I would honor the USO Girls today. When you see first hand all the time they donate to our men and women in uniform, it is rather humbling. Every Saturday and Sunday they spend their day off working at the Airport, trying to make the travel to and from the warzones a pleasurable one. And now their blog is two years old.

So, if you can find it in your heart, go over and wish them many more happy birthdays.

Don’t hold their poor choice in men against them, they really are awesome.

RIP Sergeant First Class Jared Monti

 h/t Mr Greyhawk

ALSO:  There is a Scholarship Fund set up in his name.  If you have some extra scratch, would be a nice gesture to remember this hero.  Either way, go over there and meet Jared, look at his picture and bio, and thank God for men like him.

I’m fairly certain at this point I don’t need to go over his bio, so let’s just dive into the stinking cesspool which is his Candidacy Statement:

Since publicly refusing my first deployment to Iraq last Spring, I have dedicated almost entirely my mind, body and finances to ending the criminal occupations of BOTH Iraq and Afghanistan and ensuring fair treatment for returning veterans and service members.

I like your use of CAPS for BOTH. It really moves me in a way that nothing usually moves me except dysentery and prune juice. As far as I know, your mind and finances have been dedicated to illicit substances, and your body to hookers, so good to know you have a new hobby.

For a year after my refusal, I organized and executed a grass-roots public defense campaign that resulted in my honorable discharge from the Army’s IRR which garnered wide spread media attention domestically and internationally.

Um, dipshit, you might want to check that discharge again. It wasn’t honorable, it was General under Honorable. Not the same thing.

I have extensive experience and success working with the U.S. Congress. As a board member, I will bring broad contacts from both sides of the isle to the center of IVAW’s strategic planning. As well, I have a great number of high-level connections and experience in the field of political communications that will greatly benefit this organization should I be elected to the board.

Really, name one success you had with Congress? Go ahead, I’ll wait. Name a piece of legislation you worked on that passed. And what “isle” are you talking about? I’m assuming you mean the “Isle of misfit toys”. Were you the train with square wheels, or the polka dot elephant? No wait, you were the pistol that shot Jelly weren’t you? You are such a misfit even King Moonracer banished you from the Isle. Remember, no one wants to play with a Matthis in the box. (more…)

Fun, fun, fun! IVAW puts the F U in Fun!

Yup, seems the freakazoids have themselves an election coming up. 8 candidates. For 6 slots. Yipee! I love me some choice. Now, the basic problem is sometimes it’s very difficult for your casual IVAW member, fresh off being on the lam from the DoT, to discern between the candidates who are in serious need of institutionalization from those who just need to be Rochambeaued repeatedly. That’s where your friends from TAH come in.

See, we got our hands on the 8 “2009 IVAW Board of Directors Candidate Application”s and I can tell you this….

They’re real…and they’re spectacular!

So, while I still believe that IVAW should be run as an anarcho-syndicalist commune, wherein you take it in turns to sort of act as a sort of executive officer for the week, but all the decisions of that officer have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs, but by a two-thirds majority in the case of more major issues.

Alas, they didn’t listen to me. But stay tuned for our new segment spread over the next week or so, “Better Know an Asshat Aspirant for a BM (Board Member, not bowel movement).” It’s a long title, but it is blessedly free of anything corny, and sums up just how nuts they really are.

I like to treat the Nirthers like Head and Shoulders brand shampoo:  Whip them into lather, rinse and repeat.   So, Decepticon, explain this:

Maj Cook is not breaking any rule, in fact he is testing what has been put in place; a true Patriot and a VERY BRAVE SOLDIER!!!

Google: Orly Taitz and Maj Cook in Utube and listen to what is said, this will explain the dilemma and the concern. Maj Cook has a Combat medal, so this is not about not serving or fear of serving like most morons post on this site…

Show me the “Combat medal.”

He doesn’t have one. He has a combat patch, ENTIRELY DIFFERENT*, from service in Kuwait.

*Caps for my Nirther Friends only, it apparently is what they use to show something.

This lawyer really is retarded. The military didn’t cave dipshit. They wanted someone who would actually serve, not some asshat Reserve Major playing games with the troops. They stripped his order because he was a volunteer.

Once upon a time, a nirther went to the circus. He was very excited, as he lived in RonPaulLand and had never seen a circus before.  Anyway, as circus days drew nigh, the young nirther grew ever more excited. He arrived before dawn to get the best seat in the house, and was seated hours before the first trapeze act.

 

Finally, the trapeze artists gave an awe-inspiring performance, the elephants danced, and the lion tamer tamed. At last, the clowns came out in full regalia and green hair. They rode around by the gross in a purple volkswagon. The volksie pulled up to center of the ring, and an overweight clown with orange hair, acne, and a purple nose advanced to the podium:

 

“Will the person in section A, row Y, seat 42 please stand up?”

 

The young nirther looked at his ticket, and to his surprise, he was sitting in that very seat. The young nirther stood up.

 

Clown sez, “Wellllll, there’s the horse’s ass, now where’s the rest of the horse?”

 

The nirther, dumbfounded, stood for a moment, then made his way quickly through crowd and out of the tent. Returning home, the nirther wept for days, and mourned the loss of dignity and honor. Eventually reason overcame his grief and the nirther grew determined. “I’m not going to get mad, I’m going to get even, and avenge the honor of myself, my family, and this town,” exclaimed the nirther. He picked up the curriculum guide for the Taft Law School correspondence courses and started to read.

 

Eventually his eyes came to rest on an advert for a class in “Quick Wit Retort.” “Learn how to use those snappy comebacks to your advantage, now!” So the nirther sent in his $19.95 and soon received the course materials. In a few weeks, the nirther mastered the materials, and sent the final back to Taft Law School.

 

Much to his surprise, a registered letter arrived from the president of Taft Law School. It read:

Dear Sir: We are utterly flabbergasted at your performance in Quick Wit Retort 101. We would be most gratified if you could come to Taft Law School to complete your degree with our fine academic institution. Here’s a check to cover your expenses.

To make a long story short :-), the nirther made straight A’s in the QWR program. He was awarded numerous distinctions, and when he graduated, the graduation speaker Ron Paul awarded the nirther the Medal of Outstanding Quick Wit Retort, signed by Paul himself!

 

Some days afterward, Sally Struthers Air Conditioning Repair University sent a lear-jet to pick the nirther up for an interview. The graduate admissions officer didn’t mince words. “If you complete our masters/doctoral tenured track program in QWR, you will never have to worry about money again,” said he. Needless to say, the nirther promptly moved to Campus.

 

In 5 years, the nirther had finished his doctorate. By this time, the nirther was known throughout the world as the leading expert in Quick Wit Retort. Word had even reached RonPaulLand, which made his mother very proud.

 

Everyone from Pentagon pundits to Beltway bandits consulted the nirther on technical questions of QWR.

 

One day, while sitting at his desk reading his hometown newspaper, the nirther noticed that the circus was coming to his hometown again. An evil smile crossed the nirther’s face. “Siegfried,” cried the nirther to his assistant, “We must be away to the Circus. Ready the jet!” As the plane crossed border of RonPaulLand, the nirther savored the moment of victory that was to be his.

 

The nirther arrived at the circus tent very early, making sure to get the seat in section A, row Y, seat 42.

 

Finally, the trapeze artists gave an awe-inspiring performance, the elephants danced, and the lion tamer tamed. At last, the clowns came out in full regalia and green hair. They rode around by the gross in a purple volkswagon. The volksie pulled up to center of the ring, and an overweight clown with orange hair, acne, and a purple nose advanced to the podium:

 

“Will the person in section A, row Y, seat 42 please stand up?”

 

The nirther glanced at his ticket. This time he was ready.

 

Clown sez, “Wellllll, there’s the horse’s ass, now where’s the rest of the horse?”

 

The nirther rose to his feet, full of confidence. He thrust out his chest and said in the loudest voice you can imagine:

(more…)