Figuratively speaking on the “terminally” – though I’m not sure whether we should be glad or sad about that.
In Michigan, a man was allegedly afraid of spiders. So when he saw one, he tried to burn it to death with his cigarette lighter.
While at a gas station. And while getting gas.
Did I mention the spider was on his vehicle’s gas tank?
Luckily the resulting fire was quickly extinguished without injuries – except to the gas pump involved, which was destroyed.
Idiot.
Comments
35 responses to “Yer Sunday Funny: More Tales from teh Terminally Stoopid”
This is truly a case where the term “Flaming Asshole” fits.
Maybe it is a new survival skill, from The Stunning Agency, the people that gave us The Flaming Squirrel.
Poor spider. All he had to do was ask someone to move the spider for him.
Eensy weensy spider
Went up the fueling spout.
Man took out the lighter
to burn the spider out.
Out came the firemen
to deal with all the flames.
Now the eensy weensy spider
torments the man again.
Nice one. Spider 1, Idiot 0.
There was also a couple in Ohio who robbed a bank and then posted pictures of themselves with the loot on Facebook.
Just read that one, Jonn… talk about the gene pool being real shallow with those two (plus the lack of common sense)!
It is people like this pair that causes the cops to cruse facebook. Felons displaying pistols is the current focus and they are being reeled in in pretty high numbers.
Those tatts tell me that this guy should stay away from all cameras. Pretty hard to say “That ain’t me” and expect a judge or jury to believe it.
It’s all so confusing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fry0Ce9WXWw
Too funny. When she went into the store she asked:
A) Is this station for right-side gas fills only?
B) Can you please turn pump #2 around?
c) Do you have a pump with a longer hose?
d) Can I use your phone? My car is defective and I want to call the maker.
e) Can I use your phone? I have to call a lawer in the Pacific Northwest of the United States so he can sue both the gas pumps and my car’s maker.
Gotta love those Brits.
Speaking of “lawers” formerly from the Pac NW . . . .
http://members.calbar.ca.gov/fal/Member/Detail/116636
Hondo,
Checked it out too. I was hoping to see DISBARRED, then found out it takes two business days for that to show up. ? Buddha reincarnates him into a Hills of Kentucky outhouse, or a generation of inbreeding mistake that pees and ?’s out of his mouth
Each of these mentioned above are almost as stupid, (but not quite), as landing an airplane, checking the fuel, finding that it is below recommended limits and taking off, only to crash, out of fuel a few minutes later.
The only cure for stupidity of this magnitude is to leave the planet, in a box.
Or, in a tasteful ceramic urn!
That example, Frankie Cee, is the Mount Everest of stupidity!
I’m scared of spiders, and I once nearly shot a tarantula that was in my bedroom. The only reason I didn’t is because it was between me and the only .45 mag I had loaded at the time. Personally, I’d never try to burn one with a cigarette (I don’t smoke anyway). That would put my fingers way too close to the hellspawned little bastard.
Anyway, it’s remarkably difficult to ignite gasoline with a cigarette, so if this story is true, he’s both dumb and unlucky.
He was trying to burn the spider with a cigarette LIGHTER, which will certainly ignite the gasoline.
I see. I guess I overlooked that word.
The people who study these things say that the average person eats four spiders in their lifetime; They crawl into your mouth while you sleep.
Sweet dreams! 🙂
Geez, PN.
Just Geez !!!!
Try a bit of extra sugar in the coffee if the taste bothers you the next morning. (smile)
While I’m also afraid of spiders, I know that most of them can’t hurt you. Even so, I don’t want them crawling on me. It’s those legs. But the easiest way to kill them if they’re on your car depends on the location.
On the windshield, close your windows, hit the wipers and the spray. On your visor, smack it against the ceiling good and hard. On the road, SPLAT! On the gas tank, a couple of paper towels from the dispenser and a firm ‘SPLAT!’ before you remove the lid will do nicely.
I’ve also found that 409 household cleaner kills just about any bug of any kind. Haven’t met one yet that it can’t do that to.
Flame wars are never pretty!
Has anyone considered how many of the DRG have stopped by here today and opened this post, just knowing that it was all about them?
I’m sure that at least one of those gene pool dregs are trying to interpret it as a threat in any way it can!
Okay, this link has the video:
https://www.rt.com/usa/316631-gas-station-fire-spider/
Weapons Grade Stupid!
He could have done that on Birdcath’s gas tank and been perfectly safe. No gas or fumes in there.
In fact, plenty of water in said tank, or so I’m told.
Are we sure it wasn’t Catheter-addict Bernath trying to sneak some watered-down fuel into his crash test aircraft?
If Danny wasn’t disbarred, he’d sue the fuel pump maker and the cig lighter maker for a “deadly design defect”
Let me guess – after this he went to his day job, working for the St. Louis Rams on their pyrotechnics?
This just in: the video Bernath used as a “how to fly” tutorial discovered!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6D3sBxtEQc
This takes “kill it with fire” to a whole new level.