A woman in Memphis, Tennessee came home and found her front door wide open. As walked into her home, she found two burglars having sex on her couch. The man jumped up as the resident swung a broom at his bare ass and the woman tried to cover herself with a dress she had stolen from the homeowner. The police arrived in time to arrest the female burglar, Tonka Barnes, 44, for aggravated burglary. If it had been my house, the couch would be out by the curb, along with the two dead bodies.
A 28-year-old man pulled into his driveway in North Miami Beach, Florida and a red Mustang pulled in behind him. The passenger of the Mustang ordered him to turn over his valuables which he did. Then he heard a gunshot. Finding no new orifices on his body he looked at the criminal and saw that his partner had shot him accidentally. The Blue Falcon dropped his buddy off at the hospital and drove off.
Comments
23 responses to “Wednesday morning feel good stories”
Walking in on Bernath and SlErpman that’s bad.
Incase anyone is interested, Tonka’s mug shot is below. I think that even IDC would pass.
http://tennessee.arrests.org/Arrests/Tonka_Barnes_28836741/
Thats a woman? Tonka Barnes?
This woman is named after a toy truck??
She LOOKS like a toy truck.
She looks like she got run over by a toy truck. Repeatedly. With malice aforethought, even.
That or her face caught on fire and someone beat it out with a Tonka truck.
THAT is a FEMALE? YHGTBKM!
IDC SHOULD pass on this one. Looks like a badly executed MTF trannie.
I think they posted the wrong mug shot.
Yeah, that’s the only answer… right?
Oh dear god.
Oh God, my eyes!
Drugs had to be involved. Sex with that?!?!
Ohmigawd, and that Don Cheadle always seemed like such a nice guy…
I think I may have seen her once before, at a sale barn, in Conway, AR, not far west from Toadsuck! Hard to imagine that she made it all the way to Memphis.
Don’t know about anybody else, but I hope Jonn gives us a good old fashioned poser to chew on pretty soon, as I’m getting pretty tired from fapping to Tonka Barnes’ mugshot.
You come home to find burglars having sex on your sofa, and then she tries to cover herself with a dress that she is stealing from you? You can’t make this stuff up.
And, you can’t expect that one thief will shoot the other, but it did happen in North Miami Beach. Stay armed, people.
It was much too early to see that mug shot. My shredded wheats are returning to my mouth.
when the neighbors watch, but will not call police—- it is time to move, anyway.
Check.
That’s certain, good grief!!!
Maybe she identifies as a female but is actually a male. Cant be too careful these days.
What in the actual fuck was that…
Jeez, I guess I didn’t need my breakfast anyway. Luckily it missed my keyboard, but the carpet will need a cleaning, stat.
The broom was a nice, almost poignant touch, don’t you think?