Category: Pointless blather

Longtime readers know I’m rather into music.  And longtime readers know that I’m also into musical parody.

Yeah, I’m about to ramble again somewhat – both ways.  You’ve been warned.  (smile)

. . .

A couple of months back, I posted a short musical parody. At the time it seemed to be relatively well-received. (Smile)

But it turns out that that was only half the job; it was based only on a short portion of a longer work. So I decided to go back and finish the job.

I hate to speak for others. But this time I’ll go out on a limb and say that I can’t help but think that the sentiment in the first few verses below – or something damned similar – was on Jonn’s mind a few years ago when he founded TAH with TSO and COB.  And I’m guessing B. G. Burkett felt much the same 17 years ago when he and Glenna Whitley wrote Stolen Valor.

[As an aside: if you’ve never read Burkett and Whitley’s book . . . you should go get a copy and read it.  Today.  It brought the issue of stolen valor to the forefront after Vietnam, and demonstrated just how widespread and serious it  was.  Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose.]

OK, enough intro blather.  With appropriate apologies to Greg Lake, here ya go – the complete

 

Clown Central 69 (TAH Impression)

 

Cold and misty morning, I heard disturbing rumors in the air
Concerning lying bastards about whose lies no one did seem to care;
Of true heroes ignored, their honor now purloined, just taken cold
Their valor being stolen by packs of lowlife jackals damn bold.
Liars here,
Liars there,
They’re everywhere.

Suffering in silence, good men are betrayed;
Lies hurt them and steal from them, their honor now waylaid.
Liars obtain false glory a dishonorable way.
There is no damn excuse this game to play.
Liars here,
Liars there;
They’re everywhere!

It’s time that someone exposed their lies,
Made sure their tall tales just don’t fly;
Helped those who truly rate kudos
And tore those liars some new a-hos.
We agree,
We agree,
We agree!  Yeah

Expose them?
Expose them . . .
Yes, expose them!
They’ll know some sorrow.
They’ll beg and borrow.
Start tomorrow.

. . .

Step inside, HELLO!  It’s the Stolen Valor show,
You’ll enjoy it all we know.
Step inside! Step inside!

You’ll see lies that will appall, sh!tbird bastards with no balls
Then you’ll see their just downfalls.
Come inside! Come inside!
Roll up! Roll up! Roll up!
See the show!

While they tell lies in bars their world gets knocked ajar
Proven liars wide and far.
Spectacular! Spectacular!

Now come follow me, here’s today’s specialty
Fresh poser tears you’ll see
Misery, misery.
Roll up! Roll up! Roll up!
See the show!

Next to feel the flame in Jonn’s house of poser shame
Who’s that liar truly lame?
Pick a name! Pick a name!

Watch that fake hero as he blusters and he blows,
Then he tucks his tail and goes.
Hurrah, bravo! Hurrah, bravo!
Roll up! Roll up! Roll up!
See the show!

. . .

Welcome back my friends, it’s the show that never ends.
We’re so glad you could attend, come inside, come inside!
There behind the glass stands one more repeat jackass
Smack full of BS gas, move along, move along!

Come inside, the show’s about to start,
Guaranteed to pick their lies apart!
Rest assured you’ll get your money’s worth
Bullsh!t tales ’bout Heaven, Hell and Earth!
You’ve got to see the show, there’s some real a-hos!
You’ve got to see the show, posers a-go-go!

Right before your eyes you’ll watch the posers lie
They’ll keep lyin’ till they die, till they die, till they die.

Come inside, their lies pack quite a punch
Guaranteed to make you wanna lose your lunch!
You’ve got to see the show, here’s a real wacko
You’ve got to see the show, poser rodeo, oh . . . .

Soon the ARCOM Queen behind an on-line screen
Will tell us we’re so mean – while Falconing, Blue Falconing.
Next upon the stand will you please extend a hand
To the “great” Dutch Rudder Band, Dixieland, Dixieland.

Roll up, roll up, roll up!
See the show!

Performing on a stool we’ve a sight to make you drool
Purple jumpsuit wearing fool (WhAt A tOoL, WhAt A tOoL).
We would like it to be known that the shady tales we’ve shown
Were exclusively their own, all their own, all their own!

Come and see the show, come and see the show,
Come and see the show!

See the show!

 

For those having a bit of trouble following along with the first part, here’s a clip of the full tune on which it’s based.  It’s ELP’s Karn Evil No 9 (1st Impression), from their 1973 album “Brain Salad Surgery”. The complete work is about 13 1/2 minutes, and includes several fairly extended instrumental interludes.

The tune was part of a larger work:  Karn Evil No 9, which contained 3 sub-works:  1st Impression, 2nd Impression, and 3rd Impression.  The total work was over 29 minutes long.

Because of it’s length and the album’s sequencing, 1st Impression was split on the original vinyl album into 2 parts; Part 1 was at the end of side 1, while part 2 began side 2.  Only the last roughly 4:43 – part 2, containing one of the instrumental interludes – generally got much airplay.

So if you haven’t ever heard the whole 1st Impression (or if it’s been a while), grab a good set of headphones, crank up the volume, and enjoy.  If you enjoy music of that era and genre, it’s definitely worth the time.

 

. . . so let me suggest an appropriate time and place for their next “periodic in-person get-together”.

 

 

Makes perfect sense to me.  The DRG are IMO already kinda “out there” – and you can’t get much farther “out there” than that.  They should feel right at home!

Who knows – maybe they’ll even great each newly arrived DRG member by asking them, “What’s shakin’!” (smile)

 

(Note: no, I didn’t make that image, and it isn’t a joke – that’s a real event.  Seriously.)

In music, personal familiarity is often the source of inspiration. But that’s not universally true. Outsiders on occasion have insights that others miss.

Though not the norm, that’s actually not too terribly uncommon. Robbie Robertson – who wrote much of the Band’s work that forms a tableau of America, including “The Weight”, “Up on Cripple Creek”, and “The Night they Drove Old Dixie Down” – was Canadian. John Kay of Steppenwolf was born in a part of Germany now ruled by the Soviet Union, and raised in Canada; Steppenwolf’s music is about as American as you can get.

So it should come as no big surprise that an outsider on occasion can “get it” – and write music that perfectly reflects a time and place that they didn’t themselves experience growing up. It’s not that common, but it can happen.

Yeah, this is another kinda off-topic musical “walkabout”. Consider yourself warned. (smile)

. . .

Having grown up in the South, I think I can say that it’s pretty hard to be more of an outsider there than to be a Jewish guy who grew up in a large Northeastern city. And it’s also hard to be more uniquely Southern, musically, than Delta Blues – of which Memphis is the heartland.

Rock and roll traces its roots to the confluence of Delta Blues and country. And if anyplace is rock and roll’s birthplace, that would be Memphis – specifically, the Memphis Recording Service, AKA “Sun Studios”, at 706 Union Avenue.

Yet it was a Jewish guy from Cleveland – Marc Kohn – who managed IMO to perhaps best capture the spirit and history of the place. Go figure.

The result was also something IMO truly special.

(My apologies for the 90 seconds or so of “dead air” at the end of the clip, but it was the best one, sound quality-wise, I could find.)

Kohn’s song above is often thought to be an Elvis “tribute”. In truth, Elvis is only a passing mention in the tune.

Kohn’s tune is highly autobiographical. It documents a trip he made to Memphis as an unknown singer/songwriter in 1986, at a time when his career seemed to be going nowhere.

• The “blue suede shoes” reference isn’t to Elvis, but to Carl Perkins – who recorded the tune first.

• The reference to following the ghost of Elvis starting at “Union Avenue” is a reference to Elvis’ career beginning at the aforementioned Sun Studios.

• The “Handy” mentioned was Blues legend W. C. Handy; a monument to him exists in Memphis.

• “Reverend Green” was Al Green – who was an ordained minister, and who did indeed preach in Memphis while Kohn visited; Kohn attended one of his sermons.

• “Muriel” and “Hollywood” were real as well. Hollywood was a diner in or near Tunica, Mississippi; Muriel sometimes sang there. Kohn visited both – and credits his visit with Muriel with being a large factor in his later success.

• “Beale” was, of course, Beale Street.

Both Wikipedia and Songfacts have more background. Both articles are relatively short, but if you’re interested are IMO worth reading.

Yes, Kohn’s career high point was this tune; he’s pretty-much a classic “one hit wonder”. But in this piece, IMO he nailed a time, a place – and its history – far better than most ever can.

And he did it as an outsider. To me, that’s damned impressive.

He probably didn’t actually convert during his visit. But during that visit, maybe he really did get a bit of Higher Inspiration.

Plus, I kinda like the tune. (smile)

. . .

OK, the walkabout is over for today. Back to the TAH norm.

. . . really helps pass the time on the road. (smile)

I’ll be finishing up a longish road trip tomorrow. This time I decided to do some Doobies while driving to help pass the time.

No, I’m not talking about the kind of doobies Colorado recently made legal. Geez.

I’m talking the musical Doobies – AKA the Doobie Brothers.

I have to admit I’d forgotten how good those guys were. Before Michael McDonald arrived and turned the group into essentially a backing band for his version of blue-eyed-soul, their music was quite different. Their earlier incarnation could rock with anyone.

Here are two often-overlooked gems from the Doobies. Both are from their “The Captain and Me” release.

The first is a reminder of just how well the band could rock. It’s titled “Without You” – and it’s nothing like the Badfinger tune of the same name made famous by Harry Nillson. You might want to grab a good set of headphones to listen to this one – so you can crank it up.

 

The second tune which follows is one of my personal favorites by the band. It’s a reminder of how well the guys clicked when they slowed things down and stepped out-of-character as rock-n-rollers. I think most of our male readers will be able to identify with this one.

 

That’s all for now. I still have a few hundred more miles before this trip ends, but I thought this was apropos today.

I’ve been on the road for a few days, and will be on the road and kinda busy for a few more.  Comm is a bit spotty.

I’ve posted an earlier photo from the trip in a previous article because it seemed apropos.  I thought I’d post this one today – mostly as a way to send a couple of DRC members my “best regards” (think of the Boy Scout Sign together with the phrase “read between the lines”).

Some TAH readers may know where this is.  It’s actually a pretty nice place to visit from time to time.

Regular TAH visitors probably know that at least one of our longtime commenters is a huge fan of the “Thin White Duke”.

Yes, that’s a reference to a “David”. But not David as in “David Duke”.  David as in “David Bowie”.

Bowie’s “Thin White Duke” persona of the mid 1970s masked some major issues.  At the time, the man had a serious drug habit – as well as drug-induced health problems. But unlike many of his contemporaries he managed to get a grip on his problems and survive reasonably intact.

Regardless, the man could certainly write and sing like few others.

Anyway:  this is for you, lass; you know who you are.  Here ya go, from 1992:  the Thin White Duke, resplendent here in what seems to be the late 1970s/early 1980s Army women’s AG-388 “mint green” summer uniform color.

(An aside:  believe it or not, the man actually manages to look reasonably good wearing that godawful color – which as anyone who’s ever seen any of those old women’s uniforms can tell you, is a damned difficult feat.  That color was . . . well, let’s just say its demise was one Army uniform change about which I can’t recall ever hearing a complaint.)

Here’s triple shot; Bowie wrote or co-wrote all three.  First, a duet with Annie Lennox.

 

The above clip is from the Freddy Mercury Tribute Concert. Here’s a second helping from the same evening, this time including two tunes – one of which probably my favorite Bowie tune of all.

Fair warning:  you may be a bit surprised by Bowie’s short monologue near the end of the clip.  I found it a bit out of character, perhaps – but under the circumstances, apropos.

 

A bit of background concerning the last clip.  The guitarist playing lead during that electric performance was an English gentleman named Mick Ronson.  Ronson had worked extensively with Bowie early in Bowie’s career.  (He was the lead guitarist for the “Spiders from Mars” during Bowie’s Ziggy Stardust period.)  Besides Bowie, the list of artists with whom Ronson worked with during his career reads like page from the “who’s who” of popular music from the late 1960s thru the early 1990s.

Ronson worked with so many of rock and roll’s luminaries because he was a truly exceptional musician.  Just how exceptional is demonstrated by the above performance.  Not many guitarists can upstage Queen’s Brian May.  Here . . . IMO, Ronson did.

Bowie’s monologue at the end of the performance above turned out to be even more apropos than anyone realized, but for a very different reason.  Fate decreed this would be Ronson’s last significant live appearance.

Ronson had been diagnosed roughly a year previously with liver cancer.  At the time of this show his cancer was in remission – though I think the effects of his fight with the disease show (he seems almost to be “running on empty” at times during the performance).

Unfortunately the remission ended.  A year and nine days later, Ronson’s cancer ended his life.

He was 46.

. . .

That’s all for now.  Time to return back to normal – more or less.  (smile)