Author: TSO

The whole argument over John Hawkins’ “Top 25 Worst Americans” strikes me as positively absurd, and yet apparently it has been on Memeorandum for like 3 days. Whatever. Seems to me when you write to a bunch of political bloggers and ask their opinion on something, it will come with an implied political perspective. We’re not historians, we’re political bloggers. Well, whatever. (I think quite clearly the 4 worst Americans are the lawyer who managed to outlaw Lawn Jarts, Peyton Manning, the genius that came up with “Jersey Shore” and James Woods.)

Largely I avoided the whole controversy by virtue of the fact that Jonn is a dick and doesn’t include me on such things. He is also a gay bird, Tony Romo’s Bitch, a former pilot in Strike Fighter Squadron 136, and married to Nathan Lane in Massachusetts.  No wait, actually I think that was the dude I wrote about last week, and possibly Peter Griffin who was enjoying the spirit of Massachusetts while on a vacation from Quahog.

None-the-less, I did stop by HotAir this weekend just to make sure I wasn’t missing any vital news. I was not. However, I did read this post by Jazz Shaw wherein he blasts the list. I actually didn’t read it all, but skipped down to his list, which had John Wilkes Booth as #1 and Nathan Bedford Forrest as #2. Well, I have defended Forrest before, so I decided to do so again. I actually wrote to Mr. Shaw who was kind enough to reply. Specifically I wanted to know what made Forrest so odious that he was included, whether it was the alleged KKK nonsense or the “Ft Pillow Massacre.”

His reply in part read:

I have no doubt that a careful analysis of the life of NBF could turn up some fascinating and perhaps even admirable aspects. But I’m afraid that – at least for many of us- none of it can manage to overshadow the defining aspect of being the man who essentially reconstituted the Klan.

Well, that sounded like a fun place to start, since no one ever accused him of reconstituting the Klan, and there is significant historical debate over his role in the KKK at all. (More on that in a minute.) Anyway, I went back to the post and read it in full to get more context. In that post Jazz links to this post by Rick Moran.

Now, as far as I know, I’ve never read Rick Moran. I’ve seen his name bandied about occasionally, but I don’t remember actually reading him. The only reason I even remember the name is because I once thought “Glad to see he came up with something to do after Ghostbusters and shrinking his kids.”

Anyway, Rick thinks Jonn and I are idiots, which is horrifically injurious to my psyche, because I derive all self-worth from what people on the internet I’ve never heard of say about me. Needless to say, after reading his post, I did my version of the crying game shower, and then spent the bulk of the weekend in the fetal position crying and watching Spongebob. He entitled this epic masterpiece “THE TOP 43 DUMBEST CONSERVATIVE BLOGGERS”
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You know, I’ve been known to take a few on the chin here for my support of dropping DADT. I believe as the inestimably brilliant Uncle Jimbo once sagely noted that:

If I am lying by the road bleeding, I don’t care if the medic coming to save me is gay. I just hope he is one of those buff gay guys who are always in the gym so he can throw me over his shoulder and get me out of there.

That being said, look at this story from FoxNews:

The inspector general of the Naval Air Force Atlantic Fleet is under investigation for the handling—and dismissal—of a Navy ensign’s anti-gay harassment complaint, FoxNews.com has learned.

Ensign Steve Crowston said he suffered months of continual anti-gay harassment and sexual discrimination from his fellow and commanding officers with Strike Fighter Squadron 136 at Naval Air Station, Oceana, Va.

The harassment began in August 2009, says Crowston, 36, when his fellow officers called him into a room for a review of call signs, a military moniker that easily identifies a service member. He says his name was written on a whiteboard with a list of call sign recommendations: “Cowboy,” “Gay Boy,” “Fagmeister,” “Cowgirl,” “Romo’s Bitch,” “TO,” “Terrell Owens” and “Redskins.”

First off, on the scale on inappropriate names those rank about as low on my give-a-shit-meter as it goes. VT Woody is one of my best friends, and I have called him FAR FAR worse. In turn he calls me “shit pants” probably due to the fact that I actually shit in his pants. But, that is neither here nor there. The harassment was so bad, Steve Crowston had to complain. Further,

Crowston said he was humiliated and offended by the call sign review and asked for an apology from officers responsible for coming up with the “Gay Boy” and “Fagmeister” suggestions.

“There needs to be acknowledgment that this is improper content — there’s obviously an issue with call signs — and I’m seeking acknowledgment that this is improper conduct within the aviator community,” Crowston said. “I believe I’m owed an apology for this.”

“I hope that people that have the courage to step up and know right from wrong and say something,” Crowston said. “I’m standing up for what I feel is right.

Steve, I could absolutely care less about your sexuality. I don’t care if you are the life of the party over at the Blue Oyster Bar, giving out handies in “Don’t Tell Mama” or if you are nailing cocktail waitresses two at a time. But dude, you need to be booted for having all the rugged manliness of Andy Dick. Seriously. Is the call sign stuff inappropriate? Sure, but, and here’s a distinction I like to note….YOU SERVE IN A FIGHTER SQUADRON, NOT AS THE HR MANAGER AT IBM. Jesus man, at least act like you have a pair.

If you are ever in any situation where either a superior or someone who works for you calls you “Gay Boy”, the appropriate response is to hit them in the side of the head with a chair. That’s it. Right there. You can give them a verbal warning if you must, but, I say swing. One of my dearest friends once called me chicken, and we ended up throwing punches in the mud at Ft. Bragg. After the fight we hugged and it was over. That man hug has been officially rated by Out Magazine as 1/345th as gay as complaining about a call sign.

If there was an entire squadron harassing you about being gay, assuming they never saw you playing tonsil hockey with a man, the most likely reason is that you are acting like a total phag. This is the kind of crap that is going to turn our military from the hard charging A types that we have now into a gelded fraternity of sphincter boys wearing polos and loafers. Don’t be that guy. If you can’t handle the interpersonal strife in a unit without resorting to IG complaints, you really need to rethink your occupational choice.

Maybe Perez Hilton can get you a job drawing white stuff on celebrities faces, because war is a team sport, and there’s no U in team.

If I was a young single go-getter, I would likely infiltrate this group, because you know the hot chicks in this video want nothing to do with old bug eyed jones that seems to be their only member, and I’m guessing he bats left and throws like a girl, which means your odds go up astronomically.

Turns out I must be a tea partier, because with the exception of the Glenn Beck & gay marriage thing, I agreed with like 85% of that stuff. And my gay marriage position is essentially the 10th Amendment, which I think might push my back into the group.

On Edit: Maybe not, I just went to their website, and here is their list of “facts” with me afterward:

TEA PARTY FACTS

64% of Tea Party activists think that America’s best years are behind us. This one kind of makes no sense. Right now I think we are in an absolute shitstorm, and it will be tough going, but I have faith eventually we will pull out of it. I’d like to see how this one was worded in the poll.

66% think global warming does not exist or will not have a serious impact. I think it exists, I also think that man has jack shit to do with it. Also, I don’t believe it will have a serious impact.

57% think George W. Bush was a good President. I think he was great on some stuff, and unconscionably bad on others. So, I don’t know how I would rate him. But, I believe he is a good man, which is something slightly different.

40% think Sarah Palin would also be a good President. Count me in. Yes we can!

32% think that violent action against the government could be justified. See, this is another one. It was justified in 1776 wasn’t it? I can’t forsee any violence I would support provided we still have free elections and such, so I guess I would be a no, but if I was in venezuela right now I would be supporting it, or Iran, and at one point they didn’t have the political system they do now. I wouldn’t categorically rule something out, but then again, I think we are a LONG LONG LONG way away from that one.

42% want to decrease legal immigration. If we stopped illegal immigration, I would want to reassess at what rate new folks coming in could be successfully assimilated into our society. So I guess I would have to be a no here. The problem with immigration is not the legal folks who follow the rules, it is the line-jumpers who screw over those who are waiting to get here following the rules.

41% believe that gay couples should have no form of legal recognition. No. I think they deserve whatever recognition the states should deign to give them, and essentially all the legal rights. Essentially marriage from the states point of view is just a contractual relationship, so I don’t have a problem with whatever they come up with. Actually, for the life of me I can’t figure out why the government is involved at all. Sure, I think they have a compelling reason to want to promote marriage and offspring, but it’s not like the track record on the gov’t is good, so, how about you guys sit this one out.

45% believe that abortion laws should be stricter than they already are. I think I’ll sit this one out.

59% like Glenn Beck. I don’t know, seems a little melodramatic for me. I like his books better than his radio and TV show, although he does seem entertaining from time to time. I’m agnostic on Beck. Especially after he had me on his show to discuss a movie I hadn’t seen, which seemed a bit odd.

Everytime I go there it becomes more evident that dicksmith has no clue how the legislative system works. Take this hack job he wrote I guess yesterday:

We’ve all met some people in life who have absolutely no shame. Tom Marino, a Republican running against Rep. Chris Carney in PA-10, is one of those people. Marino has recently engaged in a series of political attacks that illustrate his lack of basic human decency.

For starters, earlier this month, Marino attacked Rep. Carney for not being on a list of co-sponsors for a certain bill in the House:

“Congressman Carney has a history of saying one thing in the district and doing another when he is in Washington, D.C. Despite playing coy on the pro-life issue at home, his record in D.C. speaks for itself,” said Tom Marino, a former U.S. Attorney from Lycoming County who will square off with Carney on Nov. 2 for the 10th Congressional District seat.

“His recent actions confirm what we have always known – Chris Carney is not pro-life and has no problem spending taxpayers’ money for abortions,” Marino added.

Now, I wouldn’t be a fan of Carney being on that bill, but that’s neither here nor there. What is pertinent is that Carney had a pretty damn good reason for not signing on as a co-sponsor:

When asked Tuesday why Carney, D-Dimock Township, wasn’t on the co-sponsor list, Carney’s spokesman Josh Drobnyk said, “This legislation was introduced Thursday afternoon, the day Congressman Carney returned home to be with his wife Jennifer, who is being treated for breast cancer and underwent surgery Friday. It is absolutely reprehensible that Tom Marino is attacking the congressman for spending time with his wife prior to her surgery. This sort of attack demonstrates the kind of character and values Marino and his campaign represent. Tom Marino needs a lesson in ethics and integrity and should get his facts in line once and for all.”

Yeah, see, that WOULD be a good reason were it to be the way the system works. Cosponsors don’t sign on right after the bill is dropped, generally they cosponsor well in advance of that, so they can be “original cosponsors.” But, you don’t need to be a 10 year federal lobbyist to noodle that one through, all you need to do is read the rest of the article that dick was citing to.

Jason Fitzgerald, spokesman for the Marino campaign, offered thoughts and prayers for the congressman’s wife and said that as a two-time cancer survivor himself, Marino fully understands the situation.

But he said the excuse doesn’t hold water with the lack of co-sponsorship. The first memo seeking co-sponsors was circulated July 22 by the office of U.S. Rep. Christopher Smith, R-N.J., said Jeff Sagnip, a spokesman for Smith. Subsequently, two follow-up reminders were sent out to representatives asking for their support by the end of July 29 at the latest. Sagnip said the requests for co-sponsors went out to every member of the House.

I’m not saying dick needs to be a master of parliamentary and congressional procedure, but how about checking that target before squeezing off a round? You know, maybe come up with a votevets “rules of engagement” that doesn’t include the phrase “if it’s a Republican, let it fly whether it some wild assed accusation or not.”

A friend who shall remain nameless sent this along:

Scotland (AP) – Drinkers uninterested in designated drivers should consider the new offering on Scotland’s real estate market _ the Old Forge.

The local is Scotland’s most remote pub _ with no roads in or out. Located on the Knoydart Peninsula in the West Highlands, the thirsty must hike about 18 miles (29 kilometers) from the nearest road or travel seven miles (11 kilometers) across the sea loch from the town of Mallaig.

Owners Ian and Jackie Robertson are retiring and seeking offers starting at 790,000 pounds (US$1.2 million).

Prior to meeting Caro, my dream was to live in a Unabomber shack in BrownNeckGaitor’s back yard. Prior to that, I spent a great deal of trouble figuring out how to get marooned, like in Cast Away. And now, this. The Old Forge. Or, as I like to call it, HEAVEN.

Dude, just go read about the place on their website:

Listed as one of only 3 of “Scotland’s bloody good pubs by Peter Irvine “The Best Of Scotland 2010” and with no roads in or out, an 18 mile hike over munros or a 7 mile sea crossing, the pub is the remotest on mainland Britain (Guinness book of records). The Old Forge in the village of Inverie, Knoydart, started out as a smiddy’s forge. Later, seeing better use as a workers social club where it grew up and became a pub. The Old Forge.

There were poets and trobadours, bellydancers, winkle pickers and tweed clad ghillies, blooded stalkers, musicians, yachties, dogs and more dogs. Moorings were laid. Adverts were placed in the Free Press, “Bring your G string, no strings attached” musicians played in return for a bellyful of food and a charged glass. Seafood, became shellfish became langoustines, mussels and hand dived scallops from Arisaig, speed reading Nick Nairn, Rick Stein a foray into sea bass, sea bream, trout, venison, wild boar, and anything else edible with gills or fur that made it from our larder… sea loch or hill, to kitchen. Bramble pickin’ and fungi foraging….. because Ian is a “fun guy”! Our food menu is a living thing. A cosmopolitan community of Ozzies and Scots, Gaels and Poles, South Africaans and Kiwis, East Coasters and French. Unions formed, offspring borne, customers became Staff and Staff became customers.

Dude, “This Ain’t Hell, now coming to you live from Scotland.” Tell me that doesn’t sound good?

Fricken belly dancers, trobadors, dogs, midgets, trannys, sea bass, and Guinness. No man could ask for more in life. So, who is ponying up for my wedding gift? As of right now we are only registered at The Old Forge, so pass the hat and don’t be stingy.

And once a year would be the This Ain’t Hell Hedonism Holiday, featuring the live music of Albannach. Clothing optional for those under 40 and 200 lbs.

Tonights Menu:

Tonights menu 12th Aug Homemade Cullen Skink, hand dived Arisaig scallops and pan fried sea bass

This just confuses me, but since I don’t get much pop culture, I just had to share.

I give you the highlights of Gordon’s insanity…..

Mossad and CIA planning Nuclear attack on US Citizens:

A powerful group within the United States, one with influence over the press and the ability to derail an investigation as was done with 9/11, has been “tasked” with laying the groundwork for a terrorist attack on America, one using nuclear material. This report, unneeded, and highly inaccurate was printed in the New York Times to provide “cover.” It isn’t just this report, the pieces are falling together around the world. The Wiki-Leaks story, pre staging Pakistan’s ISI as a terrorist organization, a story built out of almost no information but fleshed out with massive speculation by “operatives” in the press is part of the process.

Israelis planned 9/11, now mastering wikipedia:

You won’t need to ask about nano-thermite, mysterious WTC7 or the dancing Israelis. You won’t have to recheck those long supposedly “debunked” stories about how many Israeli passport holders missed work that day. Check the edits on Wikipedia last week. When Wikipedia showed no Israeli passport holders among the 9/11 dead, why was it altered? If you aren’t aware, a staggering number of Israeli passport holders worked in the WTC. Conspiracy theory or statistical anomaly? I don’t know anything of people being warned of 9/11, I only know that those who claimed there was no warning lied about the numbers. We caught them. As for the truth, we may never know the truth. And so it goes.

Wikileaks=MOSSAD.

When you read Mr. Assange’s output, you are looking at one of the Mossad games, nothing more. They send some stories to Fox News, some to CNN, some to the Washington Post or London Times. They have their pick as their friends and co-workers own those outlets and so many more. The game today is using Wikileaks, given its 15 minutes of fame for trashing the US in Iraq with the helicopter video, to spread imaginary stories about Pakistan, the only nuclear power in the Middle East capable of standing up to Israel and the enemy of India.

He really ought to stop listening to the voices in his head.

So Bob Inglis, the Rep from SC that got booted in the primary, did an interview with Mother Jones. Now, just why a Republican of any stripe would do an interview with MJ is beyond me, but moving on, there is this little vignette.

During his primary campaign, Inglis repeatedly encountered enraged conservatives whom he couldn’t—or wouldn’t—satisfy. Shortly before the runoff primary election, Inglis met with about a dozen tea party activists at the modest ranch-style home of one of them. Here’s what took place:

I sat down, and they said on the back of your Social Security card, there’s a number. That number indicates the bank that bought you when you were born based on a projection of your life’s earnings, and you are collateral. We are all collateral for the banks. I have this look like, “What the heck are you talking about?” I’m trying to hide that look and look clueless. I figured clueless was better than argumentative. So they said, “You don’t know this?! You are a member of Congress, and you don’t know this?!” And I said, “Please forgive me. I’m just ignorant of these things.” And then of course, it turned into something about the Federal Reserve and the Bilderbergers and all that stuff. And now you have the feeling of anti-Semitism here coming in, mixing in. Wow.

Just to be perfectly clear, yes, I am calling this guy a liar. Now, do I believe that there are some totaly wack jobs out there that buy into this crap? Yes, absolutely. But there is no way you randomly select a dozen tea partiers, and manage to get 12 that happen to believe in Bilderberger bullshit. We get these random fruit loops that show up here from time to time to argue some jackkassery about Ron Paul and/or what country El Presidente was birthed in. And we call them out on their bullshit.

I refuse to accept that randomly selected tea partiers are insane. So, prove me wrong Congressman. I’ve been to tea partys in DC (briefly) and IN (as a blogger) and only found 2 people with crazy shit on their signs, and remain convinced that they were plants. There is no way that 12 randomly selected tea parties bought into this anymore than 12 randomly selected democrats in Missouri would espouse claims about UFOs. Not buying it.