Author: TSO

  • How The McCain Stole Christmas, a DU tale….


    (Photoshop by my internet wife Caroline)

    Like I need to tell you where this comes from.

    QuestionAll (1000+ posts) Wed Sep-24-08 10:05 AM
    Would an Obama win help save the Christmas shopping season…?
    all reports are predicting a VERY GRIM holiday shopping season, for myriad reasons, many that should be fairly obvious…gas prices, food prices, economic uncertainty…yadda tadda yadda…

    BUT-

    if WHEN Obama wins, will it give the population enough of a sense of optimism for the future and changes that are hopefully coming, that they find a way to go out and spend some money on gifts and the like to help them feel even that much better…?

    and if they steal it for mccain, we’ll have one of the worst xmas shopping seasons EVER.

    Dude, and just imagine what he will do to other Holidays.

    I heard he was a founding member of the Temperance movement, which means both St Paddy’s Day and Cinco de Mayo are screwed. He can’t eat sweets, so goodbye Easter, no chocolate bunnies and animal shaped marshmallow treats for you. And Thanksgiving? Puhleez- the man is the one who gave the native Americans the polo tainted blankets.

    Word has it that Columbus Day will be okay. Only time will tell, but for the sake of our planet, our children, and the entire Time/Space Continuum, how could we take a chance by voting McCain?

  • Rest easy America: the Trial Lawyers are manning the walls

    Biden:

    There are two people — you’ve heard me say it before — two groups that stand between us and the barbarians at the gate. It’s you [Lawyers] and organized labor. That’s it. That is it. So, mark my words, mark my words, if we lose this election, you are going to continue to see a continuation of the onslaught on everything we care about. For real. For real. So, I’m not only thanking you for your help. I would think you’re all absolutely brain-dead if you didn’t help. And I mean it.

    Great, the Lawyers are our force protection. Look, I went to law school, I wouldn’t let most of my fellow students guard a banana shack near a monkey cage. If I had to spend the rest of my life around a certain demographic of people, it sure as hell wouldn’t be lawyers or law students. There were some I liked, but most were vapid, inane and more interested in where they stood on the class rankings than where they stood on the issues.

    I’ll take my chances with the 11 Bravos gaurding the gates. We may sleep and try to pick up any woman who walks within 50 meters of it, but we sure as hell won’t sell it out.

  • An Important Message for all Americans

    I recommend you read this first, so you will understand what the hell I am talking about. And why I think everyone ought to tell the Boston Globe to stick to covering the World Champion Red Sox and Celtics, and the soon to be World Champion Patriots. Leave the heavy lifting to Bloggers, we might not be able to talk out our ass as well as you, but we aren’t pretentious anal cavities either.

    Supporting our reporters

    By TSO | September 18, 2008

    PERHAPS the most insidious byproduct of the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, has been a reflexive sanctification of the Press. To put this in bumper stickerese: Dissent is Patriotic.

    Well, I have an ugly confession to make: I don’t support the press – at least not unconditionally. When somebody tells me they serve in the press corps, my first impulse isn’t to say, “Thank you for your service!” like those insufferable jackasses on the left.

    My first impulse is to say, “I’m sorry to hear that.” Because I am. I’m sorry to know that the person I’m talking to might someday be subjected to Bush Derangement Syndrome, or might someday unnecessarily malign someone else. Or refuel the hopes of anarchists and anti-war activists that attack recruiters.

    I can’t see how anyone who calls himself or herself Christian – or human, for that matter – wouldn’t be sorry.

    The fact that we have a press corps, that we need a press corps, is inherently tragic. It’s an admission that our species is still ruled by fear and aggression.

    There are, of course, plenty of laudable functions that the press corps serves. But their sworn duty is to apparently tear down the image of the military and our love of this country. They may perform this duty with aplomb. They may feel great love for the Soviet Union or Venezuela. But we don’t pay them simply for their anti-American philosophies and their seditious written orgasms. We also pay them to try to educate people.

    And here it’s worth making a point often overlooked. Anyone who is literate in this country “supports the no-talent assclowns.” We’re the ones who subsidize their training and equipment and medical care and education.

    I’m happy to do so, as long as I believe those in the press corps are being deployed on a mission that feels morally necessary – targeting congressmen and Senators who steal our funds for pet projects, for instance, or let me know when Tom Brady will be back at the Helm of the New England Patriots.

    The problem with the knee-jerk reporting of the past several years is that it has led to an absence of anything resembling thought or moral oversight that is fundamentally undemocratic. Our reporters have become human billy clubs for Anti-war, left wing and anarchist elements in our society.

    Consider the obscene amounts that the Boston Globe and others get annually, albeit less than they have in past years. Apparently the responsibility to get the US to lose in Iraq, to capitulate to all terrorists was secretly bid – to one group, the press corps. There was much tough talk in Congress about preventing such sweetheart deals. But five years later, the US government is still pushing the fairness doctrine which wouldn’t really help as much as they had hoped.

    No surprise. After all, this was the rallying cry used to silence dissent when the core rationale for invading Iraq was being vindicated by the surge. And it’s still being used to try to muzzle Limbaugh et al..

    It remains unthinkable for a politician (or public official of any sort) to say aloud that our reporters are bumbling asshat retards who sometimes commit atrocities, that they are not all worthy of support, that some of them – faced with a terrifying and ethically incoherent mission – are driven to savagery. This grim duty has been left to the reporters themselves.

    Americans have often looked to so called peaceful protest and lampooning our great country as a means of spiritual regeneration. Our most powerful national myth is the notion that anyone reporting anything that happens is a hero. I understand why friends and families of our reporters may even feel this way. But for the rest of us, too often “supporting the reporters” isn’t about the reporters at all. It’s about the childish desire to feel morally exempt from the absolute rubbish printed in our reams of newspapers.

    TSO is the author of the essay collection “What in the Hell is wrong with you fuggin morans?”

  • Does this sound right to you guys?

    Yesterday the Senate passed S. 2339, which would:

     designate the VA Outpatient Clinic in Alpena, Michigan as the “Lieutenant Colonel Clement C. Van Wagoner Department of Veterans Affairs Clinic.” Lt. Col. Van Wagoner was in combat for 600 days while serving in the Army during World War II.

    But the next part threw me for a loop:

    He was severely wounded on five different occasions, and was only one of 32 survivors of the 1,800 soldiers who landed with the 1st Infantry Division at Omaha Beach on D-Day.

    Can that number possibly be accurate?  I doubt it, but am amenable to accepting it if someone can show it.  I find it more likely that the 32 were the only non-casulaties, but being a “casualty” doesn’t mean you are killed, you could be wounded.  But saying he was one of only 32 survivors seems unrealistic.

    Maybe I am wrong, any amateur historians out there?

  • New fantasy book available on Amazon.com

    I’ve always been more partial to George RR Martin and David Gemmell, but it seems there is a new fantasy writer on the scene and he’s coming loaded for bear.

    It’s about a bunch of disgruntled dwarves who join a military unit and go off to fight, but they see things other don’t see. So, they are fighting an actual enemy, and also a supernatural one that no one else around them can see. I haven’t read it yet, but from the excerpts, it just doesn’t sound all the realistic, even for a fantasy novel. For instance:

    “I remember one woman walking by,” said Jason Washburn, a corporal in the U.S. Marines who served three tours in Iraq. “She was carrying a huge bag, and she looked like she was heading toward us, so we lit her up with the Mark 19, which is an automatic grenade launcher, and when the dust settled, we realized that the bag was full of groceries. She had been trying to bring us food and we blew her to pieces.”

    Now, why the character didn’t just use a sidearm to down this threat, or tell her to stop before using the grenade machine gun to obliterate her isn’t entirely clear. It reads like a Schwarzenegger film where everyone is running pell mell around and the good guys never get hit. I mean, really, when you hit a lady and a bag of groceries with numerous 40mm rounds, I don’t know that you could identify the contents of the bag all that well.

    Here’s another passage:

    “One time they said to fire on all taxicabs because the enemy was using them for transportation…One of the snipers replied back, ‘Excuse me? Did I hear that right? Fire on all taxicabs?’ The lieutenant colonel responded, ‘You heard me, trooper, fire on all taxicabs.’ After that, the town lit up, with all the units firing on cars. This was my first experience with war, and that kind of set the tone for the rest of the deployment.”

    See what I mean? He’s sacrificed believability for a good yarn.

    I hope it ends with Charlie the Unicorn making it to Gum Drop Mountain.

  • WaPo asshat at it again

    So many lies. Who believes that in Afghanistan last month, only five civilians were killed by the American military in an airstrike, instead of the approximately 90 claimed by the Afghan government? Not me. I first gave up on the military during Vietnam and then again when it covered up the death of Pat Tillman, the Army Ranger and former NFL player who was killed in 2004 by friendly fire.

    WaPo Moran* Richard Cohen.

    I took the liberty of responding to Mr Cohen and shared my email with Blogfather Lilyea:

    For the record: In all my years in the army I never once ran into a soldier, airman, sailor or Marine who gave a shit what you thought of us.

    I ran an op with Afghan National Army guys one time. Their commander said 100 of their guys would be accompanying my patrol. 7 showed up. You trust them more than you do me, I couldn’t care less.

    John has written about the douche before here, here and here. Washington Post will hire anyone, apparently.

    It just astonishes me sometimes that reporters actually believe their own press.  When I start writing stuff here and think that people actually form an opinion on what I write rather than their own opinions, for the love of Spongebob kick me in the ass.

    * Moran!  Go USA!

  • Racism, Radicalism, Religion and Sheffield, Massachusetts.

    For a history department chair, this woman ain’t so bright. Roughly as bright as a black hole and as sharp as a nerf basketball.  I refer, of course, to Catherine McNicol Stock. Ms Malkin brought to my attention this execrable opinion piece by the Connecticut College History Department Chair.

    It starts out well enough:

    Despite her efforts to portray herself as an average, small-town, “folksy” American, Sarah Palin’s political views – ardently pro-gun, pro-censorship, antichoice and antigay – make John McCain’s conservative credentials pale in comparison. What few observers have said, however, is these beliefs are not just extreme – they are radical, and even bear a comparison with some of the most notorious “rural radicals” of our time.

    She’s ardently pro-gun, joining the vast majority of Americans who live outside the enclave of upper crust New Haven intellectualism. She’s pro-censorship but never banned any books. (Ms Stock, not all you read on the internet is a fact. What you read in some jackass email is even less so.) She’s antichoice which is a interesting way to phrase it. And she’s antigay despite vetoing a bill that would have taken away same-sex rights for state employees. And making John McCain’s conservative credentials “pale in comparison” is something you could do at least 30% of the time by randomly polling someone on the street, unless we have redefined conservativism to include belief in man-made global warming and embracing illegal immigration.

    But that’s not really what pisses me off about this mindless tripe. She then goes on to discuss how the Pacific Northwest is a breeding ground for racists, and thus Palin is suspect.

    Many of us have forgotten the threat once posed by domestic terrorists and instead have turned our attention to foreign terrorists. But we should never forget that in the late 20th century, ultra-Christian, antistatist and white-supremacist groups flourished in the states of the Pacific Northwest – called by many the “Great White Northwest” – the very region that Sarah Palin and her family call home.

    Really? Many use that phrase? Have you tried using teh Google with the phrase “Great White Northwest” and see what it yields? I’m not exactly finding legions of folks using that phrase. I get Canadian recipes with Chef Bari, some reference to a mountain called the “great white teacher” (damn racist mountains!!!), and some fleet of ships. I also got some shark hits, but you get the idea. Even supposing you drummed up Cletus the Local Yokel to use that phrase, what are the chances he’s referring to the crystalline water that falls from the sky and not the demographics found there?

    From there, she argues that the fewer people of color the more obviously racist the area is.

    Although home to tens of thousands of native peoples, Alaska is not much different in terms of diversity from the other states of the region. African Americans live in areas near important military installations in Anchorage and Fairbanks and almost nowhere else. Wasilla, where Sarah Palin was mayor, makes the census’ list of the top 10 Alaskan communities with the largest number of African Americans because they make up a full 1 percent of the population. Rough calculations suggest that 65 blacks lived in the town.

    OK Dumb Dumb, let me go through this for you right quick if I might. According to Wikipedia:

    The racial makeup of Wasilla was 85.46% White, 0.59% Black or African American, 5.25% Native American, 1.32% Asian, 0.13% Pacific Islander, 1.32% from other races, and 5.94% from two or more races. 3.68% of the population were Hispanic or Latino.

    I grew up in ULTRA LIBERAL Massachusetts, and my Dad was a delegate for John Kerry, ergo my discussions with him to this day center on sports teams. Let’s take a look at my home town. It’s Sheffield, Massachusetts.  It lies just south of Stockbridge, Mass, a town that has been home to Norman Rockwell, Edith Wharton, James Taylor, Arlo Guthrie etc.  The demographics for my town are:

    The racial makeup of the town was 97.36% White, 1.05% African American, 0.30% Native American, 0.24% Asian, 0.54% from other races, and 0.51% from two or more races. Hispanic or Latino of any race were 1.32% of the population.

    What is more is that this hotbed of hatred has seen the rise of violent movements in the past. Just mere miles from the bustling metropolis of Sheffield, angry anti-government radicals have engaged in serious violence. One guy even attacked a government armory in neighboring New York and then had the temerity to make off with the cannons and travel through our town on the way to Boston to attack more government forces. Damn radical Henry Knox! This was but the start, later on some radical farmers banded together and attacked the government during Shays Rebellion. From this radical cauldron was I birthed, here to wage battle on my betters, the History Department heads of Connecticut College, which until today I had never had the displeasure of hearing about.

    Back to Ms Stock:

    But the region also must be defined by its history of intolerance, resentment, antistatism and violence. Appearing in the region in the 1980s and 1990s were some of the most notorious “hate radicals” of our time: militia groups, survivalists, Identity Christians, secessionists, white supremacists and others.

    She’s apparently talking about the Northwest again and not Sheffield. Now mind you assuming that the “Northwest” is some monolithic entity is ridiculous. By way of comparison, Ms. Stock notes that the:

    Aryan Nation, with headquarters in Hayden Lake, Idaho, actively planned to rid the United States of African Americans, Jews, and other “non-Aryan” peoples.

    It is precisely 2,541 miles from Hayden Lake, ID to Anchorage Alaska. It is less than half that distance from Selma, Alabama to New Haven, CT (1144.99 miles). So, if she feels comfortable lumping the region together like that, I will too. In areas like New Haven Connecticut, racists were in positions of legal authority and used it to subjugate minorities by refusing them the right to vote, and assaulting them when they attempted to do so.

    Unfair? You’re god damned right it is. But so is using Aryan Nation to besmirch Alaskans.

    Anyway, from there, Ms Stock goes on to discuss Ruby Ridge (with Randy Weaver), Ted Kaczinski, and Terry Nichols. But even this comparison makes absolutely no sense. Randy Weaver was born and raised in Iowa then moved to a remote cabin in Idaho. Ted Kaczinski was born in Chicago and then went to school at Harvard. Terry Nichols is from Michigan.

    Iowa….Michigan…Illinois…. Wait for it…. Wait for it….

    PROOF!!! The Big 10 promotes violence. Must be the case, otherwise what could account for these three being from there?

    Her penultimate paragraph is HI-FREAKIN-LARIOUS!

    There is no evidence that Palin was ever affiliated with white-supremacist groups during her years in Idaho or at home in Alaska. [Let’s file this in the “No Shit Sherlock” folder] On the other hand, the beliefs of ultraconservative, evangelical churches like her family’s come dangerously close to those of the Christian Identity movement of those years. Likewise, Palin’s husband was a member of a political party whose members favored secession for Alaska, suggesting an affiliation with radical antistatism.

    And the denouement to this piece of tripe lets us know that she didn’t bother to research any of it, just flinging it out there like a monkey flings poop at the zoo.

    Perhaps somewhere on the record, Palin has publicly condemned the radical politics of her region. But it is hard to know where she stands on issues of race, equality and diversity. Thus it is high time to review the cultural ideals and models of the radical rurals from the Great White Northwest and find out for sure where Gov. Palin stands.

    Here’s an idea, how about we stop attacking ALL groups of people: gays, minorities or NORTHWESTERNERS, be they from this mythological “Great White Northwest” place or not. You can’t argue against prejudice and racism at the same time as prejudging people who happen to live in cold regions with fewer minorities. I look forward to your next article about Sheffield, and the dangerous band of radicals that she propagates.

    Incidentally, according to Hate Crime Statistics, in 2004 Vermont, with 602,735 people had 28 reported Hate Crimes. Alaska with 273,714 had 9. Green Mountain Boys indeed! Harrumpf! Oh, and DC with 553,523 residents had 49. Must be the gangs of White Supremicists running around.

    WANT MORE PROOF?  This is from that notoriously rightwing organization the Southern Poverty Law Center, which purports to track Hate Groups.  Are they a good enough entity to rebut your assininity, Ms Department Chair?

  • Slick move there jackass

    [kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/Tp_2Cw4RH1c" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]

    Obama=Jesus
    Palin=Pontius Pilot
    Cohen=Timmah! From South Park