What keeps James Mattis awake at night?

40 thoughts on “What keeps James Mattis awake at night?”

1. lol…at night the boogeyman checks under his bed for Gen. Mattis.

   1. General Mattis sleeps with the lights on because the dark is afraid of him.

      1. SECDEF Mattis doesn’t turn lights on. He turns dark off.

         A zombie bit SECDEF Mattis and promptly turned into SECDEF Mattis.

   2. General Mattis can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

   3. General Mattis stared into the dark until it looked him in the eye and apologized.

   4. He is the man you send to kill the boogeyman.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=soAofAWEpGU&index=4&list=RDRNBTNaqSP0I

      1. You send him to scare the Bogeyman.

         1. Damn straight… the Bogeyman craps his pants at the thought of GEN Mattis uttering his name!

   5. Chuck Norris wears Gen Mattis pajamas

2. Ok. What was his answer?
   What keeps him awake at night?

   1. If you watch the very short video you’ll hear the answer.

      “NOTHING. I keep other people awake at night.”

   2. What keeps Yef awake at night? The thought of pushing a “play” button on a video.

3. I keep other people awake at night, too.

   1. Kinky…

   2. Pervert…

   3. Kinky is using a feather.

      Perverted is using the whole chicken.

   4. sleep is a crutch

   5. To sleep… perchance to dream…
      For in that sleep of death what dreams may come,
      When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
      Must give us pause.

   6. ok, we are all adults here. Spill the beans

4. Awesome. Mad Dog!!!!!!

5. Humor and confidence. Would have been nice to have had those qualities in our prior administrations. If given adequate rein, those presently in positions of power in this administration can destroy ISIS. Those, my friends, are the words of a supremely confident badass who knows how to engage the enemy.

   1. Chief, I’d revise that to say those are the words of a supremely confident leader who knows he’s in charge of a whole lot of badasses.

6. I now have to wonder…..
   Is Chuck Norris afraid of Mad Dog Mattis?

   1. They’re both a force united against evil, so there’s no need for fear. Chuck Norris’ beard is a weapon in Gen Mattis’ arsenal.

7. I keep Stolen Valorist Kyle Christopher Barwan awake at night, except when he is in jail, then Bubba handles that.

   1. You perform those duties quite handily, Mr Cee. I’m just glad my name isn’t Stolen Valorist Kyle Christopher Barwan .
      Or whatever he calls himself while hiding from Frankie ‘The PitBull’ Cee. BTW, who’s keeping tabs on him these days? Oh yea, that’s right, it’s Bubba and Thor!

      1. So are you talking about Stolen Valorist Kyle Christopher Barwan or something ???

8. Just imagine Chesty Puller and Maddog working up a battle plan, together!

   1. Hell’s foundations tremble at the thought!

   2. First they’d have to figure out how to get surrounded…

9. Mattis’ tears cure cancer.

   Too bad he never cries.

10. It was said that some kook shot General Mattis today.
    A funeral will be held for the bullet on Tuesday morning.

11. Actually General Mattis I sleep better at night knowing you are SECDEF.

12. If I sent my cat Punkin Squawkypants to him, do you think he could get her to shut up and not tell me at 2AM that she used the litterbox?

    1. We have a cat that doesn’t need to sqwuawk to let you know she’s used the litter box…

       1. Never could spell squawk…

          1. Just like I can’t say “Worcestershire.” Pass the Wooster sauce, please.

    2. “Punkin Squawkypants”????? Was that name before or after the tequila?

13. I have heard the General doesn’t like the “Mad Dog” moniker. I heard he prefers his callsign, which was “Chaos”.

14. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zr0fJgcfdTs

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