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USS Carl M. Levin

by Jonn Lilyea••70

Arleigh Burke

In case you haven’t heard, the Navy is naming it’s newest Arleigh Burke-class destroyer after US Senator Carl M. Levin, because there haven’t been enough real heroes in the Navy to provide their names. Levin’s claim to fame was as the chair of the Senate’s Armed Services Committee. I guess there was a naming ceremony yesterday in Detroit, and of course, the Secretary of the Navy Ray Mabus was on hand for the ceremony. Levin has been involved in Detroit and Michigan politics since 1968 and never served a day in the Navy.

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70 thoughts on “USS Carl M. Levin”

  2. Next to roll out is the Social Justice Warrior or Politically Correct….

    BHWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! ! ! ! !

  3. The politicians are running the ground strategy, so they might as well have the weaponry named after them. Perhaps their staffers can become the ground forces for future wars so that our real warriors don’t have to shed blood for the follies of the Washingtonians.

  4. “In keeping with Sen. Levin’s values, the vessel will be unarmed, painted pink and will be used to guide lost whales into the open ocean. A full compliment of flags from the UN and Hamas will be stored in the ship’s signal locker. Missing from the collection is the Israeli flag but several variations of US flags have been added including one that has Bob Marley’s face, another featuring Soviet era Russian leaders and one which replaces the stars with a stylized version of the Obama logo. Set sail for adventure on the high seas!”

  5. I have to wonder if Carl Levin didn’t suggest this himself.

    Because I always thought our Destroyers were named after personnel from the Sea Services that were awarded high honors for their actions.

    Ding Ding…Ding Ding…”Carl Levin Arriving”

    Just doesn’t sound right to me.

    1. Supported by the Ammunition Ship

      USS “worst two years of my life” Cesar Chavez

      1. USNS Cesar Chavez….

        He only rated a United States Naval Ship.

        A supply ship at that, maybe it carries lots of grapes for the fleet…oh the irony.

    3. I heard the USS Bergdahl will automatically dismount any weapon system and dump it in the ocean, and then it will autopilot itself to the nearest area that sympathizes to anyone deemed an threat or enemy to The United States of America.

  7. Given Mabus’ all things female attitude, will they stop referring to ships as “she”? As in She’s a great ship, she’s under way.

  8. Somebody send Mabus a list of every sailor and Marine with a MoH, Navy Cross, and Silver Star that currently does not have a ship named after them.

  10. “I had never served, and I thought there was a big gap in terms of my background and, frankly, felt it was a way of providing service.” That’s Levin on why he sought to sit on the Armed Services Committee

    So, there you go. You knuckleheads could have enjoyed three-martini lunches, worked a few days a week for part of the year, dressed in finery, and have been treated like royalty instead of doing what you did to serve the nation. In the end, he gets a destroyer named after him and you get placed on hold by the VA.

  11. …I was present about 35 or so years ago when the USAF bitchslapped SEN Levin about the B-1s being based in Michigan, and I got to see the little creep up close and personal one morning a couple years later. SECNAV ought to be ashamed of himself.

    Mike

  12. I’m naming all of my spaceships after women. So there!

    And I’m naming all my cargo ships after my favorite recipes, as in BBQ Beans N Smoked Sausage.

    1. Crap, hope Raybee doesn’t read that. It would be right up his and Odumba’s alley.

      1. PLEASE DON’T put “Odumba” (or any variation thereof) and “alley” in the same sentence.

      1. Yeah, I think we knew. If it had actually happened, a certain SECNAV would have been tarred and feathered and then keel-hauled.

      1. That’s funny. You added the s and omitted the h in the self correction. I’ve done that sort of thing too. Now, unless it’s an essential word that I omit, I let the typos stand naked for the world to see.

  17. I feel for you Navy types.

    If I EVER see a USS JugEars, I swear I’ll blow my brains out.

    1. I’d be OK with naming one after JugEars, provided it was a garbage scow. But then I was an AF guy, so I’ll defer naming rights to our Naval folks.

    2. The Marine Detachment aboard USS JugEars would all be armed with umbrellas.

      They keep the rain off, and you can also use ’em to repel boarders.

  18. Oh for pete’s sake. We don’t currently have a destroyer named for Ernest Evans, and IMO, we should pretty much always have one of those. Especially before we start naming them after bureaucrats.

    1. Of Taffy 3 fame, here is CDR Evans’ citation:

      For conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at the risk of his life above and beyond the call of duty as commanding officer of the U.S.S. Johnston in action against major units of the enemy Japanese fleet during the battle off Samar on 25 October 1944. The first to lay a smokescreen and to open fire as an enemy task force, vastly superior in number, firepower and armor, rapidly approached. Comdr. Evans gallantly diverted the powerful blasts of hostile guns from the lightly armed and armored carriers under his protection, launching the first torpedo attack when the Johnston came under straddling Japanese shellfire. Undaunted by damage sustained under the terrific volume of fire, he unhesitatingly joined others of his group to provide fire support during subsequent torpedo attacks against the Japanese and, outshooting and outmaneuvering the enemy as he consistently interposed his vessel between the hostile fleet units and our carriers despite the crippling loss of engine power and communications with steering aft, shifted command to the fantail, shouted steering orders through an open hatch to men turning the rudder by hand and battled furiously until the Johnston, burning and shuddering from a mortal blow, lay dead in the water after 3 hours of fierce combat. Seriously wounded early in the engagement, Comdr. Evans, by his indomitable courage and brilliant professional skill, aided materially in turning back the enemy during a critical phase of the action. His valiant fighting spirit throughout this historic battle will venture as an inspiration to all who served with him.

      BTW, there was a ship named after him (DE-1023), but no continual name has legacied in the fleet for Evans or the Johnston; unlike the Samual B. Roberts.

      1. The book is “The last stand of the Tin Can Sailors”.

        One IJN ship of the opposing “center force”, the super battleship Musashi (largest ever built anywhere, ever), outweighed the entirety of all the ships of Taffy-3.

        What they did was the most amazing underdog victory in the history of Naval Warfare. Absent their undaunted Valor, our invasion of the Philipines would be remembered as an epic defeat and disaster.

        I would think we could name small combatant vessels from that one battle, and have enough names for hundreds of them.

        1. Actually, Musashi had been sunk 4 days earlier. Yamato was there though, and couldn’t land a single hit.

          In addition to a USS Ernest Evans (although it’s doubtful a destroyer could stay afloat with the weight of that man’s name–his balls alone would overload a carrier), how about:

          USS Paul Carr
          USS Henry Elrod
          USS Norman Scott
          USS John Finn

          Those are just a few I could think of off the top of my head.

          Carriers should get legacy names: Enterprise, Yorktown, Lexington, Hornet, Bonhomme Richard, Valley Forge, Ranger, etc. No presidents except Washington, Lincoln, or (maybe) FDR.

          LHAs/LHDs should be named after battles (with the exception of legacy names Midway, Yorktown, Lexington, and Saratoga): Gettysburg, Belleau Wood, Cowpens, Lake Champlain, Normandy, Antietam, Khe Sanh, Chosin, Tarawa, Wake Island, etc.

          Cruisers should be named after cities. Period.

          Destroyers and frigates after SERVICEMEN who distinguished themselves in action.

          Battleships after states. I still say that reworking the Montana-class design into a BBG with armor, big guns, and VLS is a better investment than the Zumwalt and LCS combined.

          Subs after aquatic animals, ideally predators.

          Noncombatant logistics ships can be named after politicians.

          And a septic treatment/disposal vessel is a perfect fit for (USS Barack Obama.”

    2. That’s true. Milk served in the Navy (of course) and a while ago there was a push to name a ship after him. Why? Because he was gay and got shotted.

  20. Okay, here’s question for you water people. If the Navy distinguishes between boats and ships, why are all of them officially designated with USS (United States Ship)?

    1. Yer cornfuzed. Ships carry boats. Boats can have a name, but are not a USS anything. Submarines, while actually ships and have a USS designator, are by tradition called “Boats.” Among other things.
      Better?

        1. On second thought, I withdraw the question. You now have insight into why I walked past the Navy recruiter’s shack.

      2. But we Airwinger types called our Carriers Boats…mostly to piss off the Black Shoes that were Ship’s Company.

  21. Since it appears we’re just randomly naming these fine ships now, how about USS MATTIS? Team that ship up with SPRUANCE, HALSEY and BURKE and everybody that gets in the way gets a Surigao Strait style beat down. Hell, I’d come back on active duty from retirement just for the chance to wear a USS MATTIS ballcap.

  22. Navy ships named under the oBaMa Regime include the Medgar Evers (No politics there), John Murtha (spit!), Cesar (Don’t Buy Grapes) Chavez, and Gabrielle Giffords.

    “Navy Secretary Ray Mabus, under fire from Congress and veterans for naming ships after fellow Democrats and social activists, plans to announce another round of ship names in the near future that will be more traditional, a Pentagon official tells The Washington Times.” Washington Times, 14 Feb 2012

    Levin is more traditional?

    1. Whomever is selected to be the next SECNAV will hopefully have some guts and unfuck the political BS involving the naming of ships. And while they are at it, rename the four listed above for real heroes!

  23. Naming a Port-a-Potty after Levin would be a god-damned disgrace to fiberglass.

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