George V sends this thoughtful piece;
So, the NORKS are talking nice to us. Wow – let’s all celebrate. Or maybe not.
Maybe here’s what happened: China’s Xi invited Kim to lunch, and over some kimchee and rice Xi said “Kim, stop being an idiot. Pissing off the US will not get you anything, especially with a Republican president. Make them mad enough they will come at you. But if you play nice with them in a few months you can push them around like they have casters on their shoes. In 12 months you will be able to stick your hand in the back of their necks and make them say whatever you want.”
“Learn from the Chinese example. 25 years ago we were a 3rd world joke. We made nice with the west, said things like “market economy” and “reforms” and “freedoms”. The western political and business leaders fought each other to get into China like a Black Friday crowd at Wal-mart.
What?
Oh, uh.. just..look it up on the internet. What? W-A-L-M-A-R-T, got that? Anyway, these fools agreed to all our terms, they let us own over half of what they built here, they f&*^ing GAVE us all their technology, they even taught our engineers in their universities and even put them on leading edge research projects. They let us pretty much take over half their manufacturing and now they can’t build a cheap toilet without us. And now, we can build anything they still make, like cars and airplanes because we learned how they have done it.”
“And at the same time they pretty much dismantled their long range military assets while they got their private parts caught in the Middle East. Reminds me, I need to thank those Taliban guys in Afghanistan, maybe buy some drugs from them I can resell to those MS-13 weirdos in the States at a profit. The Taliban will buy some AKs or ammo from us so it all works. Wait, where was I?”
“Oh yeah, so, now we’re popping out new weapons – ships, tanks, fighters and all sorts of new missiles and s&*t – we’re puttin’ em out like hens poppin’ out eggs at one of their factory farms. Those fools in Washington can’t touch us now. If they tried we would squash them like I had to do to that freakin’ spider in your crummy bathroom when I stopped by your place.”
“And, now that we are not a 3rd world s^&*thole, and are d#$n near the biggest economy, to the point where everyone is signing up for our “Belt and Road” thing (and is that a great scam), we can go back to being what we’re supposed to be – a dictatorship. The citizens who now work in our new economy won’t rock the boat, aside from the occasional… what do they call them…“dissident?”. The people want their paycheck. The peasants actually haven’t seen a major difference in the past 25 years so they won’t care. This whole change in China has been a scam on the West and nobody on their side had a freakin’ clue. I swear, as long as you talk nice you can take off these guy’s pants, take their underwear, redress them, and when they get ready for bed they’ll wonder where their boxers went. No, Kim, no – do not not actually try this, please.”
“So, again Kim, make nice with these guys. Feed them a line of BS how you’ll open your markets, treat your people better, and such. Smile and wave. They will give you whatever you want, at whatever terms you want, as long as they think they can make money. And you will have to let them make some – but it’s OK, you will come out ahead on any deal. And you will have to let your people have some stuff – but you will find your people will forget all the crap you and your family have done to them over the years. Once you’ve got your economy rolling, the families of folks you’ve been shooting with AA guns will bury you in cheers right up to your phenomenal whitewall haircut.”
“And, after you’ve taken over another goodly chunk of their economy, fire up the nuke project, build some new tech weapons and quietly do away with anyone who makes noise against you. By the time they wake up, you’ll be able to shoot down, sink, or otherwise obliterate anything they sent your way.
One last thing – if you don’t make nice to them, I’ll pound your head with a 50 ton hydraulic press.“
