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Weekend Open Tread

Holiday Open Thread

Weekend Open Thread

123 thoughts on “Weekend Open Thread”

    2. K. Claw I have a alibi LMAO….
      Sunday is the big start of game day here in T-town…
      In cryptic gang talk the drop stars at 0730 Sunday morning

    1. I wanted to write more but by the time I did, I would have been number 16 or more. Anyway, it’s The Weekend Open Thread. Bernath’s favorite thread of the week. From which he gleans most of his “important information” which keeps him apprised of all things This Ain’t Hell. Well Daniel, here’s to a weekend of tooling around on the old bike, gun toting and the “ins and outs” of life with a catheter. By the way, do you still keep crutches in your car for using your Disabled Parking plate or hang tag? Do you keep a pair by the front door with the umbrellas in case a Jehovah’s Witness comes by handing out The Watchtower? But it’s suppose to be in the 80s all weekend in Fort Meyers so get some sunshine. Vitamin D is important to mental health you know. As well as the proper uptake of calcium, which we all know is important for weak bones. Especially weak bones caused by Agent Orange exposure. Wait a minute. Agent Orange exposure? But Daniel, you never, ever served on any Navy ship, during any period of the Vietnam War, which qualified it to be included in the list of Naval vessels who’s crew members can claim exposure to Agent Orange. How did that get by the VA? Don’t they have a list of qualifying vessels and times? Well to be honest, I doubt the VA has a list of their own phone numbers so I doubt they do much verification. Well to end this, I hope you don’t fall off your bike. Ah BULLSHIT! Who am I kidding. I can see you hitting a big fucking rock and taking a header over the handle bars and landing on a storm grate. Maybe then those crutches will have a valid use.

      1. AGP (Assault Group Patrol/Patrol Craft Tender) LCM (Landing Craft, Mechanized) LCU (Landing Craft, Utility) LCVP (Landing Craft, Vehicle, Personnel) LST (Landing Ship, Tank) PBR (Patrol Boat, River) PCF (Patrol Craft, Fast or Swift Boat) PG (Patrol Gunboat) STABS (Strike Assault Boats) WAK (Cargo Vessel) WHEC (High Endurance Cutter) WLB (Buoy Tender) WPB (Patrol Boat) YFU (Harbor Utility Craft) Daniel I’ll help you select one, never mind you don’t even know what these are. Have a fine Navy Day!!

          1. Y’all just keep laughing.

            The cheese thieves are, obviously, intending to change their 4 tons of stolen for 3 tons of clean Velveeta.

            By this time next year, they’ll have Milo Minderbinder’d that Velveeta into global control of the international cheese trade, as well as complete ownership of the hard wood supply, ancient Greek statuary and military optics development.

            Betcha y’all wont be laughing then.

  7. My thought for the day:

    “I started with nothing and am proud to say I have most of it left.”

    And Go:

      1. This is totally unconfirmed. There is no living creature, human or otherwise, who would allow Crash-and-Bernath anywhere near their genitalia.

        1. (Allegedly)
          Some guy in Bethesda with no mailbox door. 😀 😀 😀
          Whitless holds the magnifying glass and Birdbath uses binoculars.

  8. Just a weekly shout out to Dickless Dan Bernastypants and his fellow anal buttsekks warrior buttbuddie QUEEFERS!!!

    1. Just a question, out of curiosity, Senior Chief: do you think the Universe might implode if lOnGRaNGeSlUrPeer and that Barerra guy both put on purple pantsuits and jumped out of an airplane together?

      1. Yes, especially if they do a HANO (High Altitude, No Open) drop – it may rip open of the fabric of the space/time continuum and place us into an alternate dimension, which would provide quantum theorists the absolute proof that time travel is plausible.

        Either that or they make a big purple SPLAT on the ground and the drop zone, requiring a HAZMAT team to clean up…

        1. Hmmm… and I thought it was the warp bubble that NASA was working on. Oh, dear. This may let the Snakes into this Universe far too soon. Whatever shall we do?

          I know: cookie time!!

      2. EX-PH2,
        I am wondering if you caught the part of Shipley’s Video where Birdnutts used his life-line to call up Whippenfloggit and put him on Speaker.
        Dullass was drunk as Cooter Brown, slurring his Speech, and asking if anywhere had two purple hearts…
        It got a chuckle out of Don who asked him is had been drinking already.

        1. No, I don’t have a subscription to ESE’s videos, so I haven’t watched any of them yet. Waiting for the free show.

    2. There is always one of these guys in every crowd.

      cc: United Dairy Council, World Clown Assoiciation, Ex-Lawyers Club

      not sarc/ those are actual organizations

    2. Mr. Faker Six- I have been curious about something. When Rooshia trained you for Spetznatz, did they spend 10 million dollars on you? Or more?

  12. ATTENTION! We interrupt this thread to bring you three special announcements:

    ONE
    The Brylcreem is back in the tube.
    The Brylcreem is back in the tube.

    TWO
    Moon Phase. REPEAT. Moon Phase.

    THREE.
    These boots are made for walking. These boots are made for walking.

    We now return you to the thread.

      1. Yeah, go ahead and joke Hondo.

        Don’t complain when you can’t open the zip file from GOLF FRANK UNICORN.

        We had the same problem last week passing photos!

        So there!

    2. NO!

      ALPHA SIERRA SIERRA (double reverse).

      We are using NSA Blue switch this weekend.

      If we are going to use codes, please take it seriously.

      Out!

      2. non coded msg.
        START
        19 hours
        and
        14 minutes
        all hell is breaking lose in Arizona
        or popping out
        will post updates
        as they come in
        out

            1. That really frosts my flakes. All updates are the latest. All status is current. I was in a briefing earlier in the week when someone said “most up to date latest information”.

              1. K.. Lol… New UpDate she is at a 4 1/2.. she is in a Hurry Up and Wait Mode….
                Damn it’s like the Army all over again…

                What Are The Odd of That….. 🙂

                BREAK BREAK BREAK
                they just up the Pictosin…
                I’m having a heart attack…
                or is that
                craping my pants ??
                more updates soon
                —————————-
                OVER AND OUT
                —————————-

      1. There will be eventually. But the CA Supreme Court has to put their stamp (or is that curbstomp?) on it just to make it official.

        1. I like the idea of the CA supreme court being the ones to curbstomp him….more than I probably should

        2. He’ll probably file ethics violations against whichever judge is in the trial and then file a motion to recuse the judge… if his typical comic antics hold.

          1. He did that against the trial attorney. The judge would have nothing of it.

            For those playing the TAH board game home version …

            The trial for DAB’s disbarment and all records associates along with decision from court will be public.

            I am told, because I know nothing about it, the documents in their entirety are epic!

            But what do I know …

  14. Got a notice in the mail yesterday from the OPM. Told me my personal information was stolen, SS number and all. Big shout out to the incompetent retards at OPM and the current administration in general. Oh and before I forget, fuck you Bernath and that goes for the rest of you DRC mutants.

    3. Yeah, 30 – 40 million + spouses + kids under 18 + anyone else listed.

      So let’s round it 100 million.

      Nice job OPM, you have compromised about 1/3 of the entire country (legal citizens).

    4. nice to meet you Climb to Glory
      I’ve gotten three so far my guess is one for big Army, one for NG, and one for DOE or DOD but who really knows, my wife got one also because she worked at the DOJ… all be it only five years or so
      tee-shirts are on order please hang tight……

    6. I’m getting ready to call Lifelock and ask them why I pay them for a membership since I get free credit monitoring every couple of years on account of shit like this.

  16. Yet another week goes by where the Dutch Rudder Gang HAS FAILED to find me. For their own good, the fercoct shmendricks have ceased to accuse innocent Men of being me. I still say to them “GEY STRASHE DI GENS!”, putzes!!! 😀

    And I once again wish a very happy and relaxing weekend to all of The Fine People of TAH®™! :mrgreen:

    1. PROUD,
      The idiots couldn’t find you if sat in a booth across from them at a restaurant.
      Dumb and dumber than a rock ?

      1. You and I both know that Reb, I just like saying it knowing that it drives Daniel A. Bernath the Fred Phelps clone bonkers!! 😀
        With all due respects, I think you owe rocks everywhere a sincere apology, all of them put together make a driveway pebble look like Albert Einstein.

  17. I was going to post this over on the Hasan story but I figgered that it would get more traffic over here.
    So the men, real men and women that took Hasan down are having problems getting the government to pay for their treatment…
    Well, this will put a little icing on that cake for you…
    The pukeface that gunned down “American Sniper” Chris Kyle and his good friend Chad Littlefield is now considered disabled by the VA and is getting $2,800 a month for a service connected disability.
    they also gave him a $30,000 back payment lump sum and is also supplying him with a team of three court appointed lawyers for his defense in capital murder charges.
    One would think that $2,800 would disqualify him for a court appointed attorney at least…
    But really, the whole thing just stinks like a fucking dead skunk on a hot july day in the Texas Sun…

      1. Whew, just looked this up. Apparently his VA claim came back while he was on Trial. Shitbag’s mom had control of the money and the Judge issued an order that the funds were not to be touched.
        This was as of February 2015. Also since he was found guilty of murder his pension was automatically cut to 10%… So at the most he is getting 280 bucks in his prison canteen allowance, if that. Not that he should get a penny

  18. Whew! Somehow our “Stolen Valor” page lost all of our phonies from February 2014 back to 2006. So, I’ve been up trying to restore it all night. If I missed one or several, let me know.

      2. Oh, thank goodness! You had me worried there, JL.

        I thought someone might have been looking for Hondo again.

  20. I will have BREAKINGS NEWS later out of my FOB OC.

    Stay tuned it is troubling news!

    1. BREAKING NEWS:

      I returned today to my FOB. The driveway was covered in leaves.

      I immediately reported the incident to the police.

      Out!

      1. FOLLOW UP:

        LE has determined that the leaves in my driveway came from trees, most likely all of the leaves from trees on my own property.

        This incident has been closed, however will remain ever so vigilant moving forward.

        1. Any chance you want to spend some of those “Bernath Bucks” for a little fall cleanup?

          I shouldn’t laugh. I haven’t even done my first pass at leaf cleanup (usually have to do at least two.) There was a leaf tornado in the front yard this morning.

    2. Damn! I thought maybe you were going to tell us that someone in another state had decided to file persecution complexes against a bunch of other people.

  21. More breaking news.
    The Hildabeast says she tried to join the USMC and the recruiter said no. Its time to spin her story for her own needs.

    1. If true whoever that recruiter was needs to be awarded a Legion of Merit, and also granted a 100% Disability Claim for PTSD for having to deal with that libtarded hose-beast.

  22. Here is some video I recorded at the annual “SCOTS ON THE ROCKS” Celtic Festival in Moab, Utah.

    https://youtu.be/QpQhc2EcArc?list=PLuhBygcdO23AVrY7WACMGrG9Fs9dU8N7o

    Yes, a couple of folks took pictures of me, but I don’t have any copies.

    There was a massive power failure, source unknown, affecting communities as far South as Blanding, and as far North as I-70.

    For $2.00, I had a wee bit of HAGGIS to snack on.

    As far as I could discern, I was the ONLY member of my clan attending.

    Because of sudden health problems, I missed the Tattoo, which I had so looked forward to, and I didn’t stay for the Opening Ceremonies.

    Still, it was an interesting trip.

  24. Anybody else see the Navy fireworks display last night over the West Coast? Apparently, the submarine USS Kentucky launched a test Trident II from off Pt. Magu which did a high-altitude burn visible in three states. Those squids. They always seem to get the coolest toys.

    Reports so far that Nancy Pelosi wanted to surrender are unconfirmed…

    1. It was all over the news.

      UFO’s and aliens had arrived, and they were all demoncrats.

      2. I caught the last part of it from on the ground just north of San Luis Obispo. At first I thought the Air Force had cranked one off from Vandenberg, something they’re known to do from time to time.

  25. So what’s the latest 411 on Bunni-Boi Dalton Coldiron?

    He came on the Iraq Veteran killed in Colorado Springs thread the other night and called the Sergeant who was discharged as a Private a “fellow nco”.
    Then he threatens to whip Smitty’s ass again?
    Then he says he reenlisted, finished boot camp, and was recently discharged as a e-5(his grade designation,not my misspelling).
    But it was only 15 or 16 months ago that he was saying he was back in boot camp and was getting ready to go to the Ranger course.
    How did he manage to do all that, bolt all the way up to e-5 and then be discharged in so short a time?

    Or is he just spreading his bullshit again? He has been instructed (by Hondo no less, so I think he should comply) to forward his latest batch of documents to the powers that be, but I’m not holding my breath that will ever happen.

    Inquiring minds want to know. Is Bunni-Boi feeling froggy? Is he looking for another curb stomping? Does he really want to become another Chew Toy?

    That’s enough questions for now. We’ll see if any of it plays out.

    1. Ah! CLAW, you said the magic word: BULLSHIT. You get the afternoon off plus a box of cheap cigars and stale whiskey.

      1. I calls em as I see em.

        Bunni-Boi is a mass distributor of either Bovine, Equine, or Porcine fecal matter.

        But maybe he has been consuming too many Leporidae Pellets mistaking them for brown M&M’s, and that’s where his little train ran off the tracks.

      2. Did I miss a memo somewhere?

        I was away from the keyboard for a while out harvesting some marigold seeds, filling the freezer with a half of beef, etc.

    2. One hell of a story teller… Odd but I have two sons up in Wichita, Ks… One is at boot camp At Benning the other makes U-Tube videos… Is in that UFC Stuff… It’s not all the far from perry, ok
      May hav to take a trip and visit

    5. He’s been playing “Call of Booty – Anal Buttsekks Warrior” again… probably using the “Rump Ridin’ Ranger” expansion pack.

    1. Yeah, but it’s ONLY been there for 14 years, I’m sure there are plenty of pols and bureaucrats that think they just need to keep it a little longer, they’d HATE to see bureaucrats get pink-slipped!

  28. I watched the “Bernath Part Two” video again today, and YEAH, Daniel A. Bernath the Fred Phelps clone was shitting squirrels when he was confronted with the shit he has stirred! I STILL think he’s more fuxxed up than a gay black Jewish transsexual NeoNazi in the KKK and more confused than a busload of blindfolded lesbians in a fish market!!!

  29. OK, last comment on the WOT before closing it out.

    I would love to be a fly on the wall for the next two days at any Army-Navy surplus store in the nation. You know the posers are lining up to get a new set of duds to appear respectable when they launch their buffet raids at Golden Corral and the Olive Garden on Wednesday.

    Anybody taking bets on how many fist fights break out in the uniforms section when there is only one XXXXL shirt left on the rack?

    1. I was thinking the same thing Claw. Had dinner at GC last week and the bride noted the freebie advertisement on the table. I said no way in hell.

    2. I will be marching in and working the NYC Veterans Day Parade again this year.

      Like every year, finding posers is like shooting fish in a barrel.

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