Paul sent us a link to some hipie chick’s website in which she gives dating advice. She copied from Matthis’ Facebook page a typical “Matthis-as-victim” missive about him being better than the rest of us;
Feels like the anti-war libel machine’s firing up again. It hurts being called a rapist for being the only one in IVAW to describe military sex culture in honest and self-incriminating terms. Read ‘confessions of a war resister’ for clarity on my story.
It makes me very uncomfortable too, and very ashamed. The shitty thing is, I know just about every male who’s ever been in the military has at least one similar experience, but boys are too afraid to be men and tell the truth about their penises.It was rape, no matter what the law says.
People gotta deal with this. Acts like what I did are normalized rape and cannot be excused. I’m ashamed of myself. Other’s should be ashamed for me.
But part of why this is so hard for people is because it’s very widespread, both in and out of the military. Prostitution and pornography have become normalized in our society. If I’m a rapist than 40% of the male population in the U.S. have or will be rapists. Within the military, I believe this percentage would be staggaringly higher, and certainly there is a total awareness of its existence. So if this is rape, which it is, what does that mean on a broader scale?
What sucks is people’s lack of awareness of how critical this is and their willingness to use someone’s story against them, ignoring the issues and projecting their fears instead.I’m not a rapist, but that was rape, and rape is happening on a broad scale, and we have a responsibility to stop it.
Now, did you follow that line of logic – “I raped, but I’m not a rapist, you should feel ashamed for me. 40 Percent of American men rape (don’t ask me for statistics, just accept my hyperbole as fact) a staggeringly high rate of military men rape (because i say so). I’m not a rapist, but I rape women and it’s more than likely your fault. I’m just a victim in all of this because, because, because…well, just because I’m cool enough to come out and admit it.”
First of all, no one on this side of pro-troops movement is calling Matthis a rapist. He’d better check to see who is saying that stuff – I’m just addressing the issue now because Matthis has brought the issue to the surface. Since he’s in his late twenties, i think it’s about time he stopped blaming everyone else for him being a failure and a sociopath and start accepting some responsibility. By trying to make us all rapists for his childish behavior, Matthis is making himself look foolish.
It’s like Red Foreman used to say “Your life is hard because you’re a dumbass”.
No different than our current Prez playing the blame game. It’s always someone elses fault. Matthis is doing what leftists do; play the victim.
Sounds an awful lot like some guy trying really hard to convince us that he got laid at least once in his life. And probably only once.
Or maybe buyers remorse.
I am the one, one of many, who call him a rapist. I stand behind that. Matthis is a rapist, plain and simple.
Okay, if he’s so guilty over it, why hasn’t he turned himself into the authorities? Prostitution per se is illegal in the Phillipines, hence the “bar fine”…but if she said no, then he should be doing time and a little “boom-boom” with the Filipino version of Bubba?
Sorry, the above comment was me.
I read it twice and now my head hurts.
Ron White had a show titled” “You Can’t Fix Stupid”. For some reason it came to mind while reading this.
Also, somewhere there is an English teacher spinning so fast in their grave that they have their own gravity field.
Matthis:
“Life ain’t easy when you’re just plain sleazy.”
Not your fault that you raped the chick? Who unzipped your pants, asshole? You are trying to blame others. I am “others”, and if you were to try to blame me to my face, I would slap your sissy ass into yesterday.
You, like Cindy Sheehan, have used up your time in the limelight; get a life,,,,somehow, somewhere.
Nuf Sed
The person who wrote this article exemplifies a type of feminism that is really just modified socialism. It pushes a narrative of exploitation and domination by a ruling class against a disenfranchised majority. Rather than argue for the freedom of women to do what they like with their own bodies, this type of feminist opposes things like prostitution and pornography because those industries are supposed to be the embodiment of that oppressor vs the oppressed narrative. They do not care if an adult woman wants to strip, prostitute, or perform in pornography. All they care about is their cute little story about oppression and victimization.
It is all bullshit. Whining about a “sex culture” is just one more way for them to take shots at contemporary Western, capitalist culture. They do not care about women, and they do not care about victims. Incidentally, a group of women made a video on this subject and posted it to YouTube. It is pretty long (that’s what she said) at just under ten minutes, but it is very good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TdEYqOZY_E
I have to refute this nonsense. I too served in the military. Young male testosterone monsters objectifying women and engaging in promiscuity, paid and unpaid, sure. Equating that to rape, BS! Stop blaming me and everyone else for who you have chosen to be, a whining child crying about what’s wrong with the world and who’s to blame for it. It’s time to shut up and contribute something positive to society. Good Grief.
Robert, I guess if you pay it can’t be rape?
And Chris, good point. To allow women to decide what to do with their bodies would mean actually listening when a prostitute says she is raped, and not assuming sex with one is rape. It’s a two way street few people are willing to travel on.
This guy has become an absolute caraciture.
Dr. Chiroux, your son doesn’t want to stop. He doesn’t want to ‘get a life’ and he certainly doesn’t want to have to work or contribute anything positive to society.
I’m reminded of a conversation that Blanca relayed about conning stupid people (paraphrased). That is at the root of this situation — Matthis is convinced that he is smarter than anyone else on the planet. He truly is pathologically narcissistic.
Anonymous: I did not say that. Please don’t Matthis me, so to speak. Drawing this line is not clear cut and has spared many guilty men and condemned innocent ones, and some women, to be more inclusive. The issue here is my son is now acknowledging that wherever that line is, he crossed it. His next step is to take full responsibility for his own actions and stop blaming everyone else.
Something else to ponder… I knew Matthis in high school. It is well known that he was ‘socially promoted’ out of Auburn High because they were sick of dealing with him. He didn’t actually ‘pass’ — they simply let him graduate to get rid of him. This begs the question — why? I know many people that barely cracked open a book in high school (myself included) and still managed to graduate with a 3.0 or higher. If Matthis is such a genius, how did he manage to essentially ‘fail’ high school?
If a person has ever been in a situation where a rape occurred and the perp tries to excuse his shit behavior…then you already know there is no help for such a sick bastard.
People can call this idiot out time and again and it will roll right off his back as he pretends to feel remorse to hang onto to the pity others in his circle give him.
What a load of utter bullshit! Why didn’t the person he violated press charges? Or did I miss something? This buddy fuckr is constantly topping himself!!
John, I’m surprised you didn’t link to the blog post. Also, you misspelled hippie.
Here’s the link: http://datingscoreandreport.blogspot.com/2010_05_01_archive.html
Also, it’s really a shame that the veteran “antiwar crowd” has to be disgraced by people like him. Then people rally around these guys because they’re loud and piss people off whom we don’t like.
My reply:
Looks like the anti-war movements golden-boy Matthis has hurt feelings.
“Feels like the anti-war libel machine’s firing up again.”
Umm, it’s not libel when it’s true. Does even know the definition of that word or how to use it?
“It hurts being called a rapist for being the only one in IVAW to describe military sex culture in honest and self-incriminating terms. Read ‘confessions of a war resister’ for clarity on my story.”
It hurts being called a rapist? I’m going to go out on limb here and say it probably hurts to be raped. As far as describing the Military sex culture well, maybe me and my friends where just too busy trying not to get blown up to worry about how to buy hookers. Now, I do know guys both in and out of the Military who have bought Women for sex. Pay for play is not really my thing, but I will not pass judgment on them. What has always troubled me about Matthis’s “CONfession” is that unlike most naive young men away from home for the first time, in another country and about to engage in prostitution, he had a strong feeling that she was a victim of human trafficking, but raped her anyways. But remember, it hurts his feelings when you call him a rapist.
“It makes me very uncomfortable too, and very ashamed. The shitty thing is, I know just about every male who’s ever been in the military has at least one similar experience, but boys are too afraid to be men and tell the truth about their penises.”
Really? I can line up Soldier after Soldier I served with who has never engaged in what he claims. Let me reiterate the point that some of us actually went to war and didn’t get to travel the World and party down with a cushy job. We had to deal with survival on top of many of us dealing with the reasons we were there and what we where taking part in. Men take responsibility for their actions, Matthis. I know I’m being too harsh again, and it make Matthis feel uncomfortable and ashamed. I bet that poor girl felt uncomfortable and shamed with Matthis put his unprotected penis inside of her.
“It was rape, no matter what the law says.”
So when I call you a rapist, it’s not libel, your favorite word, it’s the truth. Thanks for confirming that for me. Also, since you acknowledge your crime, why not turn yourself in?
“People gotta deal with this. Acts like what I did are normalized rape and cannot be excused. I’m ashamed of myself. Other’s should be ashamed for me.”
Who the hell has been normalizing rape other than you and your supporters? “It’s ok to be rapist as long as you blame an organization we hate.” says the anti-war movement. I met a lot of different types of people in the Army. More good than bad to be sure, but even the ones that where “off-base” in the morals department hated rapists. Crimes against Women would anger them just as much as any other good person. Apparently those calling for Justice and Moral conviction the most are the ones most devoid of it. Yes Matthis, we should all feel ashamed for poor you. What about your victim, and the other victim’s cries you ignored? Oh, but your feelings are hurt and we should take that into account. Poor, poor Matthis.
“But part of why this is so hard for people is because it’s very widespread, both in and out of the military. Prostitution and pornography have become normalized in our society. If I’m a rapist than 40% of the male population in the U.S. have or will be rapists.”
Where the hell does that statistic come from? I’ll agree that pornography is really mainstream in our society, but what qualifies this 40% assertion? Is he talking about taking part in prostitution? So 40% of all Men in the U.S. have or will engage in prostitution therefore making those Men rapists by default? Um, I think there is a strong difference between having unprotected sex/rape with a girl who you felt might be a victim of human trafficking and pulling an Elliot Spitzer. But I forgot, on his side of the fence Women, Minorities, a people of other countries are constant victims for guilty feeling, fame seeking white people to chant and hold signs for. I think that people of different skin colors and women would be pretty pissed to be constantly downgraded by these idiots. Women and Minorities are equals, not victims.
“Within the military, I believe this percentage would be staggaringly higher, and certainly there is a total awareness of its existence. So if this is rape, which it is, what does that mean on a broader scale?”
I must have been sick the day in Basic Training where we went through the Rape Obstacle Course (ROC). I also was unaware of the job in the Army called “Rape and Sexual Assault Specialist”. I get tired of these people constantly labeling Service Members as brainwashed rapists and murders. What if I said all African Americans where “such and such”? I’d be crucified, and rightfully so. Why not when people degrade those in the Military as all being an evil this or that?
“What sucks is people’s lack of awareness of how critical this is and their willingness to use someone’s story against them, ignoring the issues and projecting their fears instead.”
I think he might be talking about me. One, I’m not fearful of Matthis or of admitting to crimes or wrongdoing. Has anyone here seen Fire Mission? Yeah, my record speaks for itself. I guess I am unwilling to budge when it comes to the rape of Women. I know poor Matthis is the eternal victim, but he’s only a victim of himself.
“I’m not a rapist, but that was rape, and rape is happening on a broad scale, and we have a responsibility to stop it.”
Raping a Woman makes you rapist. Sorry bud, but you are the scum of the Earth. Also, if you noticed that in his posting he has not talked about the pain he inflicted on his victim? It’s all about his shame and sad feelings. That poor girl doesn’t even really factor into his thought process. It never even factors in to his supporters, many of whom refer to themselves as Feminists, or Radical Feminists. Excuses for rape are completely unacceptable.
I know some of you share this with Matthis, and it’s ok if you do.
One thing about this is the liklihood it is all BS. The first time I heard about the Palawan trip it was to set up a field hospital, provide care for the islanders and then pull out leaving all our supplies behind for the local physicians. Matthis was so proud of the “good” we did and as I recall he never left the protective “Marine” detachment he was sent along with to cover the story for Camp Zama. I hope this blog reaches others who made the trip and can clarify. In my opinion the reason my son will never turn himself in is because it never happened. God help him if he starts claiming he raped an Afgan girl. FUBAR
“Crimes against Women would anger them just as much as any other good person”. And, rapists typically have a bad time in prison, every con there has a mother, some have sisters, wives and daughters, and they don’t want to be around a rapist, or even breathe the same air. So, it says a lot about the “people” that Matthis hangs with, their morals and mores are worse than those of people doing time in prisons.
Yes, if this is a true story I am sure that Matthis has not considered how the person felt.
One thing for sure is if he was buying the sex and still raped the person, I can almost bet what his mindset was despite what he tries to get others to believe. And that is that if she was being paid it must not bother her to be abused so, what the hell?
And, when shit didn’t go his way, then he thought about how to look as if he gave a rat’s ass about human trafficking and never gave a thought to *the* woman.
As Casey points out, rapists are scum-sucking pigs who are not sorry for what they have done. And, IMO, they will repeat the offense time and again with others as long as they are not caught.
To even have the mother fucking balls to try and excuse his behavior makes me wretch. He’s right up there with Eve Ensler and her Vagina Monologues…she and Jane Fonda want to make the word “cunt” *nice* again!!
Really? Is that like “rape” is nice? Fucking idiots, all of them.
Freenavybird, you were on the dot in your last post about the pathological discrepancy residing in Matthis. He has a covert-aggressive personality disorder. Some of the tell-tale signs that people, especially women, ought to look out for:
Denial – This is when the aggressor refuses to admit that they’ve done something harmful or hurtful when they clearly have. It’s a way they lie (to themselves as well as to others) about their aggressive intentions. This “Who… Me?” tactic is a way of “playing innocent,” and invites the victim to feel unjustified in confronting the aggressor about the inappropriateness of a behavior. It’s also the way the aggressor gives him/herself permission to keep right on doing what they want to do. This denial is not the same kind of denial that a person who has just lost a loved one and can’t quite bear to accept the pain and reality of the loss engages in. That type of denial really is mostly a “defense” against unbearable hurt and anxiety. Rather, this type of denial is not primarily a “defense” but a maneuver the aggressor uses to get others to back off, back down or maybe even feel guilty themselves for insinuating he’s doing something wrong.
Selective Inattention – This tactic is similar to and sometimes mistaken for denial It’s when the aggressor “plays dumb,” or acts oblivious. When engaging in this tactic, the aggressor actively ignores the warnings, pleas or wishes of others, and in general, refuses to pay attention to everything and anything that might distract them from pursuing their own agenda. Often, the aggressor knows full well what you want from him when he starts to exhibit this “I don’t want to hear it!” behavior. By using this tactic, the aggressor actively resists submitting himself to the tasks of paying attention to or refraining from the behavior you want him to change.
Rationalization – A rationalization is the excuse an aggressor tries to offer for engaging in an inappropriate or harmful behavior. It can be an effective tactic, especially when the explanation or justification the aggressor offers makes just enough sense that any reasonably conscientious person is likely to fall for it. It’s a powerful tactic because it not only serves to remove any internal resistance the aggressor might have about doing what he wants to do (quieting any qualms of conscience he might have) but also to keep others off his back. If the aggressor can convince you he’s justified in whatever he’s doing, then he’s freer to pursue his goals without interference.
Diversion – A moving target is hard to hit. When we try to pin a manipulator down or try to keep a discussion focused on a single issue or behavior we don’t like, he’s expert at knowing how to change the subject, dodge the issue or in some way throw us a curve. Manipulators use distraction and diversion techniques to keep the focus off their behavior, move us off-track, and keep themselves free to promote their self-serving hidden agendas.
Lying – It’s often hard to tell when a person is lying at the time he’s doing it. Fortunately, there are times when the truth will out because circumstances don’t bear out somebody’s story. But there are also times when you don’t know you’ve been deceived until it’s too late. One way to minimize the chances that someone will put one over on you is to remember that because aggressive personalities of all types will generally stop at nothing to get what they want, you can expect them to lie and cheat. Another thing to remember is that manipulators – covert-aggressive personalities that they are – are prone to lie in subtle, covert ways. Courts are well aware of the many ways that people lie, as they require that court oaths charge that testifiers tell “the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.” Manipulators often lie by withholding a significant amount of the truth from you or by distorting the truth. They are adept at being vague when you ask them direct questions. This is an especially slick way of lying’ omission. Keep this in mind when dealing with a suspected wolf in sheep’s clothing. Always seek and obtain specific, confirmable information.
Covert Intimidation – Aggressors frequently threaten their victims to keep them anxious, apprehensive and in a one-down position. Covert-aggressives intimidate their victims by making veiled (subtle, indirect or implied) threats. Guilt-tripping and shaming are two of the covert-aggressive’s favourite weapons. Both are special intimidation tactics.
Guilt-tripping – One thing that aggressive personalities know well is that other types of persons have very different consciences than they do. Manipulators are often skilled at using what they know to be the greater conscientiousness of their victims as a means of keeping them in a self-doubting, anxious, and submissive position. The more conscientious the potential victim, the more effective guilt is as a weapon. Aggressive personalities of all types use guilt-tripping so frequently and effectively as a manipulative tactic, that I believe it illustrates how fundamentally different in character they are compared to other (especially neurotic) personalities. All a manipulator has to do is suggest to the conscientious person that they don’t care enough, are too selfish, etc., and that person immediately starts to feel bad. On the contrary, a conscientious person might try until they’re blue in the face to get a manipulator (or any other aggressive personality) to feel badly about a hurtful behavior, acknowledge responsibility, or admit wrongdoing, to absolutely no avail.
Shaming – This is the technique of using subtle sarcasm and put-downs as a means of increasing fear and self-doubt in others. Covert-aggressives use this tactic to make others feel inadequate or unworthy, and therefore, defer to them. It’s an effective way to foster a continued sense of personal inadequacy in the weaker party, thereby allowing an aggressor to maintain a position of dominance.
Anonymous: Yep. That sounds about right.