Yesterday I was searching about the Interwebnet thingy for some festive tune to post. I must have started singing one of the songs as I went about my day. <\/p>\n
I called TSO to chat about high priority super secret stuff but it turned out I just mostly listened to children torturing the man. I no longer have any idea why I called in the first place but remembered my favorite parenting skill was sending the kids to bed early on some trumped up charges. My sons were called “Search and Destroy” and my daughter responded to “What Now”. <\/p>\n
The Hair called not long thereafter. I thought he was going to thank me for the tip about Grecian Formula being on sale at Target. Did you know that as goslings geese will bond with the first suitable moving stimulus, no matter if this is a goose, person or even an object? They remain dedicated to that person or object as their surrogate \u201cparent\u201d throughout their lives. Or did you know that Goose is actually the term for female geese, male geese are called ganders? A group of geese on land or in water are a gaggle, while in the air they are called a skein. Fascinating to hear about all that stuff in his erotic Shipley voice.<\/p>\n
The Soviet came home at some point to goose-step around the compound. Her shrill is almost as sensual as Shipley but not as suffering as TSO’s.<\/p>\n
She demanded I explain to her why I kept singing, “Mayonnaise … mayonnaise … mayonnaise”. <\/p>\n
Having no clue WTF she was talking about I checked the calendar and it was only the 12th so I should have another week before Broadzilla takes over her soul for a few days. I went about my business by mustering a deaf focus only a ranting Spousal Unit can conjure out of me. Just as I thought she had passed out from eating a gallon of Dulce de leche ice cream she came at me like Khrushchev at a United Nations function shrilling, “That’s it, that’s it”.<\/p>\n
My fellow Americans, I give you the ever popular seasonal classic, “Mayonnaise … mayonnaise … mayonnaise”.<\/p>\n