{"id":81004,"date":"2018-08-06T09:07:29","date_gmt":"2018-08-06T13:07:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/valorguardians.com\/blog\/?p=81004"},"modified":"2022-01-23T22:43:00","modified_gmt":"2022-01-24T03:43:00","slug":"join-the-exciting-world-of-stolen-valor-investigations","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/?p=81004","title":{"rendered":"Join the exciting world of Stolen Valor Investigations"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Some of yuz might be aware of a recent opening in the Circle of Trust.\u00a0 Our resident Army guru has moved on to better things.\u00a0 If you would like to join this exciting field of unlimited bullshit and mass confusion, please do not hesitate to contact us.<\/p>\n

All we ask of an investigator is:<\/strong><\/p>\n

A willingness to put up with my constant haranguing.<\/p>\n

Generally lucid individual that looks forward to being the FNG<\/p>\n

Ability to give good phone.<\/p>\n

Some of those highly trained operator language skills would be a plus.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Can deliver a compassionate approach to the monthly death threat.<\/p>\n

An abundance of time currently devoid of any purpose.<\/p>\n

Possess an ability to decipher clues.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Preferably they have been in the Army, knows someone who has been in the Army or at least slept with someone that was in the Army.<\/p>\n

A good working knowledge of all that Army Bling, patches, pins, and hats would be really helpful.<\/p>\n

They will have to sign an SF-180, pass a background check, complete some home schooling and be willing to attend a formal course that will actually make them a Private Investigator.<\/p>\n

You can complete additional training\u00a0 if you wish to do Fugitive Recovery and or Personal Protection.<\/p>\n

If you are still living in your mothers basement, have a man bun, are afraid of scary black guns, or spend a significant part of the day playing with yourself…this is probably the career opportunity you have been waiting for.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The good new is; I am the Stable Genius of the crowd.\u00a0 The rest of these guys really got some serious issues.\u00a0 \u00a0So if you just can’t seem to get that edge back since they made you turn in your Contractor Satellite Phone and they stopped sending checks your way…hit me up.\u00a0 I can put you knee deep in the shit.<\/p>\n

We try to work with most disabilities.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Neatness counts, we like to keep things organized.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Thank you for your time.\u00a0 Please send inquiries to dave@militaryphony.com<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Some of yuz might be aware of a recent opening in the Circle of Trust.\u00a0 Our … Join the exciting world of Stolen Valor Investigations<\/span>Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":667,"featured_media":81005,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,218,6,84,30,5,7,391],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-81004","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-antiwar-crowd","category-feel-good-stories","category-media","category-military-issues","category-phony-soldiers","category-politics","category-terror-war","category-valorvultures"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81004","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/667"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=81004"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81004\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/81005"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=81004"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=81004"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=81004"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}