{"id":56927,"date":"2014-12-08T10:37:45","date_gmt":"2014-12-08T15:37:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/valorguardians.com\/blog\/?p=56927"},"modified":"2014-12-09T11:15:43","modified_gmt":"2014-12-09T16:15:43","slug":"56927","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/?p=56927","title":{"rendered":"West Regional of the 2014 Blue Falcon Stolen Valor Tournament"},"content":{"rendered":"

WEST REGIONAL IS NOW CLOSED, GO VOTE IN SOUTH REGIONAL.<\/a><\/p>\n

Whelp, here we go.\u00a0 If you want to know more about these clowns, just type the last name into the search engine above and have at it.\u00a0 I’m limiting hyperlinks here because you guys don’t click them very often, and you probably remember most these dudes.<\/p>\n

Vote is at the bottom, make sure you click enter or done or whatever it is after you have voted in EACH RACE.\u00a0 You should have 8 selections.<\/p>\n

Seed 1 verses 16:<\/p>\n

1) Nate Fornwalt, Lemonade Stand Stealing Phony, Embellisher<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Fornwalt_Nate\"<\/a>
\nCLAIM<\/strong>: Wounded veteran with numerous purple hearts, Marine Special Ops.
\nTRUTH<\/strong>: Iraq vet with no purple hearts, no Special Ops.
\nThere\u2019s a very special place in hell for people who steal money from an 13 year old Gold Star kid\u2019s lemonade stand. (It\u2019s the same place in hell reserved for ship captains who would take advantage of Saffron, those who think Taylor Swift is awesome, and Jets fans.) Matthew Ott runs a lemonade stand in memory of his veteran mother who died when he was young, the proceeds of which go towards veterans in need. Apparently Fornwalt was in need of a new cane, or possibly an X-Box 1. He also makes shitty snowmen with blood on them to \u201chonor\u201d the guys he lost overseas, because Lord knows I\u2019d want to be honored for my sacrifice by some money stealing jackass who can roll snow into balls and then stick a carrot in the face.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

 <\/p>\n

16) John R. Acton, Constable Prevaricator, Valor Thief<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Acton_James\"<\/a>
\nCLAIM<\/strong>: Vietnam Vet or a US Army Veteran in the Vietnam Era, with “advance infantry warfare” and a \u201csecret clearance MI. level 4″ and was a decorated officer. Sometimes he said that he was honorably discharged due to an injury, other times he said he was retired military.
\nTRUTH<\/strong>: Discharged as private after a gruelling 4.5 months in service.
\nRunning for Constable of San Tan County Arizona must be the thing to do. And one way to ensure you have no chance whatsoever of winning that race is to just make shit up out of thin air. His campaign theme was \u201cHonor Courage Experience\u201d. #NailedIt 0\/3. I particularly like him using a American Legion solicitation as proof of service. I would have liked to use my experience in Red Dead Revolver from Afghanistan to apply for the position of gun fighter, and I think I will model my campaign on Acton\u2019s patent pending approach of just inventing it.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Seed 8 v. 9:<\/p>\n

8) Julee Johns, Funeral Phony, Embellisher<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Johns_Julee\"<\/a><\/p>\n

CLAIM<\/strong>: Medically discharged Marine Drill Instructor, master sergeant, OEF\/OIF
\nTRUTH<\/strong>: 16 days in boot camp. Almost the same thing, right?
\nJust watch:
\n