{"id":39313,"date":"2014-01-15T07:37:33","date_gmt":"2014-01-15T12:37:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/valorguardians.com\/blog\/?p=39313"},"modified":"2014-01-15T07:37:33","modified_gmt":"2014-01-15T12:37:33","slug":"gimme-all-your-money-or-ill-fork-you-up","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/?p=39313","title":{"rendered":"“Gimme all your money or I’ll fork you up”"},"content":{"rendered":"

Tim sends us a link to an article from Connecticut<\/a>, where the criminals are really low rent, I guess. Dude stuck up a Mobil station clerk with a fork;<\/p>\n

Police say the clerk reported that a lone suspect entered store wielding the utensil just before 2:30 a.m. The suspect fled on foot after procuring an undetermined amount of money from the register. He was described as a white man with a scruffy beard, wearing a white hat with a green brim, a blue jacket, blue jeans and work boots. He was also described as enjoying food. <\/p>\n

The Bristol Police Department is searching for a break in the case so if anybody has seen a suspicious looking man holding a fork, don’t be [a] hero. <\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Good thing that Connecticut passed all of those gun laws last year, huh? The clerk should bring a spork to work to fend off the next flatware-armed thief.<\/p>\n

Well, to make this a “feel good story”, Tim also sends us an article from Surprise, Arizona<\/a> where a jewelry store clerk ended a robbery with his handgun;<\/p>\n

Officers said three men walked into a store in the 13700 block of West Bell Road shortly after 3 p.m.<\/p>\n

They displayed a weapon and told the employee that they were there to rob the store, according to police.<\/p>\n

The clerk then pulled his own gun, which scared off the men, officers said.<\/p>\n

No shots were fired and nothing was stolen.<\/p>\n

The would-be robbers remain at large.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Just look for three fellows with large brown stains on the seat of their trousers.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Tim sends us a link to an article from Connecticut, where the criminals are really low … “Gimme all your money or I’ll fork you up”<\/span>Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[218],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-39313","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-feel-good-stories"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39313","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=39313"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39313\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=39313"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=39313"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=39313"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}