{"id":37915,"date":"2013-10-10T08:59:04","date_gmt":"2013-10-10T12:59:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/valorguardians.com\/blog\/?p=37915"},"modified":"2013-10-10T14:20:32","modified_gmt":"2013-10-10T18:20:32","slug":"darwin-award-thursday","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/?p=37915","title":{"rendered":"Darwin Award Thursday"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I feel like shit right now with a cold, and with all else going on I figured it might be worth laughing at the dumbassery of some &#8220;yutes&#8221; who tried turning their lives around, not with guns this time, but with a blowtorch, and the expected hilarity which ensues.<\/p>\n<p>This story from today&#8217;s <a href=\"http:\/\/www.concordmonitor.com\/home\/8854408-95\/investigators-say-fireworks-in-safe-caused-hopkinton-explosion\">New Hampshire Union Leader<\/a> tells the cautionary tale of a couple of not-so-cautionary gents who, despite their recent legal troubles including felony charges of receiving stolen property, forgery, and so forth, decided their lives needed some excitement, and chose a blowtorch to cut into a safe containing (what else?) fireworks.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>According to the state fire marshal\u2019s office, \u201cthe two males were attempting to gain entry into a closed metal container which contained consumer fireworks using an oxy-acetylene cutting torch when the blast occurred. The investigation has revealed that the two victims did not have permission to be on the property.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Thomas Komisarek, owner of New Yard Landscaping, said the container was a safe. <\/p>\n<p>\u201cThe whole thing went up and blew their bodies apart,\u201d Komisarek said. <\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Okay kids, altogether now: &#8220;Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I feel like shit right now with a cold, and with all else going on I &hellip; <a title=\"Darwin Award Thursday\" class=\"hm-read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/?p=37915\"><span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Darwin Award Thursday<\/span>Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[209],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-37915","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-teh-stoopid"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37915","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=37915"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37915\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=37915"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=37915"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=37915"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}