{"id":37158,"date":"2013-08-19T15:13:19","date_gmt":"2013-08-19T19:13:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/valorguardians.com\/blog\/?p=37158"},"modified":"2013-08-19T16:16:43","modified_gmt":"2013-08-19T20:16:43","slug":"day-1-from-gitmo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/?p=37158","title":{"rendered":"Day 1 from Gitmo"},"content":{"rendered":"

Remember when Jonn live blogged the last hearings<\/a>, and it sounded like a debacle? \u00a0Well, there are 33 motions before the court to address this week. \u00a0We are currently stuck on number 0. \u00a0Yup.<\/p>\n

This morning revolved around two key issues, 1) whether Mustafa Ahmed Adam al Hawsawi can speak English, and 2) why haven’t the defense attorneys signed the memorandum of understanding that the judge ordered them to sign back in January.<\/p>\n

As for #1, I don’t want to ruin the surprise for you, but yeah, dude speaka da English just fine. \u00a0He was interviewed by 3 college educated people for 20 hours spread over 4 days a few years ago. \u00a0 They asked him if he needed a terp, and he said no. \u00a0They asked if he understood his rights, he said yes. \u00a0Apparently the defense theory is he was just saying things for the sake of saying things. \u00a0You know, but for an ironic twist of fate he might not have said so much “yeah dude, I totally get what is going on here, and I am fine with it” and perhaps more so “pickles!” \u00a0Which is odd because the FBI agent this morning testified that Hawsawi was articulate and had a friendly demeanor. \u00a0Which is not what one expects when someone is yelling at you in a language you don’t speak. \u00a0For instance, if I ran up to him and started yelling in Pastun “parmak preweja” (lay down on your stomach) I’d expect the dude to look confused, or punch me in the face. \u00a0This guy was friendly.<\/p>\n

Anyway, the part 2 was so convoluted that I’m not even going to go into it here. \u00a0I’ll just say that I was somewhat amenable to the argument the defense was making, but I haven’t read the governments response. \u00a0And because it deals with secret info, and how shit is classified, I can’t really base it on anything tangible. \u00a0Two of the lawyers seemed really rational, two seemed batshit crazy, and I was agnostic on the last attorney. \u00a0So, I don’t know.<\/p>\n

Either way, the morning session drew to a close because Hawsawi (who you’ll recall can’t speak English, despite his being able to write English, including work documents) somehow conveyed (possibly) through interpretive dance and\/or shadow puppets that he wasn’t feeling well. \u00a0Something about his neck, but I saw the dude looking around the whole time. \u00a0In fact, dude gripped his neck like Rodney Dangerfield grabbing his elbow in Caddyshack. \u00a0Not to be outdone, bin Attash (represented by the lady in the Burkha Cheryl Bormann) complained about gastroenteritis. \u00a0 So, we come back from a 75 minute break, and now bin Attash is asking to be able to put on the PUP (physically unable to perform list) with Rob Gronkowski and Major Hasan’s legs. \u00a0So now the question is whether this guy having the hot squats should stop the hearings for the day, or whether they should move on without him.<\/p>\n

So, after an hour and 15 minutes, we are waiting now on the doctor to show up and tell us how this guys bowels are doing.<\/p>\n

Maybe more later. \u00a0More likely I’m going to go to my tent and watch episodes of Psych I have on DVD and fall asleep by 7 pm.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

OH, BTW: \u00a0KSM looks every bit like the lunatic you would assume. \u00a0His beard is asinine. \u00a0Looks like he tried to tye dye it or something. \u00a0Just silly bad. \u00a0Also, he walks like a lego person. \u00a0I don’t really know how to describe that. \u00a0You ever seen a little person fall over and push himself back up by just using his hands? \u00a0KSM looks like that’s his preferred ambulatory method as well.<\/p>\n

And bin Attash looks like a skinny Jerry Garcia. \u00a0Hawsawi is like the kid in the Science club at your school, and Aziz Ali looks like a stoner who is on the verge of getting very angry about the theft of his caramel corn.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

UPDATE:<\/strong> Yes, we are now discussing Al Qaeda diarrhea. \u00a0 So, I am sitting here listening to Bormann and the doctor discuss how long he’s had the shits, I am mentally adding to the Diarrhea song.<\/p>\n

When you’re sitting there in court, and you have to make a squirt, diarrhea…diarrhea<\/p>\n

When you’re lawyer wants to fight, but you just want to take a shite, diarrhea…diarrhea.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Remember when Jonn live blogged the last hearings, and it sounded like a debacle? \u00a0Well, there … Day 1 from Gitmo<\/span>Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":148,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-37158","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-politics"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37158","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/148"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=37158"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37158\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=37158"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=37158"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=37158"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}