{"id":31445,"date":"2012-08-10T11:58:27","date_gmt":"2012-08-10T15:58:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/valorguardians.com\/blog\/?p=31445"},"modified":"2012-08-10T11:59:56","modified_gmt":"2012-08-10T15:59:56","slug":"your-stolen-valor-final-four-a-childrens-story","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.azuse.cloud\/?p=31445","title":{"rendered":"Your Stolen Valor Final Four – A Children’s Story"},"content":{"rendered":"

Sharkey the Pooh and the Stolen Valor Honey Pot<\/p>\n

\u00a0\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Sharkey the Pooh was a failure at everything he did.\u00a0 He failed at wrestling, politics, movies and kidnapping.\u00a0 And so he tried to think of what he could do.\u00a0 But he was a pooh with a very little brain, so when he thought, he thought in the most thoughtful way he could think.\u00a0 So he looked in the mirror and thought.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy God am I fat\u201d he proclaimed.\u00a0 \u201cMaybe it\u2019s all these burgers I eat.\u00a0 Before I think, I should work off this lard!\u201d<\/p>\n

Up, down, up
\nWhen I up, down and touch the ground
\nIt puts me in the mood
\nUp, down and touch the ground
\nIn the mood for food
\nI am stout, round and I have found
\nSpeaking poundage wise
\nI improve my appetite
\nWhen I exercise
\nI am short, fat and proud of that
\nAnd so, with all my might
\nI up, down and up and down
\nTo my appetite’s delight
\nWhile I up, down and touch the ground
\nI think of things to chew, like honey
\nWith a hefty happy appetite, I’m a hefty happy Pooh
\nWith a hefty happy appetite, he’s a hefty happy Pooh<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\u201cI know\u201d he cried!\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019ll steal the honey pot of valor that other folks toiled for!\u201d<\/p>\n

And so he did. Before moving to Russia because he thinks Putin is the shit.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

But this made Eeyore sad, because he didn\u2019t have a tail<\/del> tale of his own.\u00a0 SO he asked his friends to help him find one.<\/p>\n