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Christopher Tirao; Rolling Blunder

by Jonn Lilyea••105

Our buddy, Scott, sends us the research he did on Christopher Tirao, who calls himself “Rolling Thunder”, a name given to him by his Indian Great-grandfather. He’s probably the mightiest warrior ever to grace these pages. He says he has over 30 years of military service and he’s done it in every branch of military service (sorry Coast guard, he missed you guys).

Yup, he was in “Nam” three years after the rest of us pussies left. He even stayed in Iraq for nine years while the rest of us were fat and happy at home. Need his narrative of his service?

There you go, aren’t you ashamed of yourselves? Lazy pogues, I’ll bet you all only went to one service. I mean this Billy Badass started out as a pilot and then became a SEAL. Oh, and if you go read the rest, he was a Navy SEAL Aviator, too, a rare breed of man, indeed.

The President (he doesn’t say which one) gave him this $6 hat, too for his service in Desert Storm. I didn’t get a hat, but then, I wasn’t a jet pilot/SEAL/Marine/Special Forces/Ranger, either.

Highly decorated, you ask? You betcha; he got the Silver Cross and the Distinguished Star. What? You never heard of that shit? Well, that’s because you’re all POGs. Here’s a picture of them for you;

As he warned Scotty, his records are classified and no one can find them, cuz, you know, he’s so high speed no one can keep up with his exploits, especially not some high-drag records clerk;

He claims he’s Native American, too, but the Indians are asking “Who?” So he must’ve been a secret Injun, too, and the tribes had to seal his records so white eyes can’t see them.

I don’t know how he found the time, what with fighting all of those secret wars for the country, but apparently he has some prison time, too.

But if you have some time, you should click over to Scotty’s place and read the whole thing, you’ll be sorely ashamed of your own puny service afterwards.

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105 thoughts on “Christopher Tirao; Rolling Blunder”

  1. So among the thosands of completely fabricated bullshit. Why does he claim a POTUS (Doesnt say which one) gave him a hat that is attached to a drug task force in southern asia….wouldnt he have just been given it if he was part of it? Oh wait thats right….he earned it just like all those “metals” he has….gawd must be so hard to be a badass like him…making up lies on the fly…an i know my grammer or spelling isnt the greatest but damn. I know that theres aptitude tests for all the so called jobs hes had…maybe his ptsd from being at home an pretending so hard fucked him up….fml this guys awesome. So awesome i had to take the time to comment about it from my phone.

  6. They poser busters did a damn good job with this assrat, but like so many other posers, Tony “Tiger” Meyers, Author “Cookie Monster” South, Dallas “Dildo/Dilly” Wettengate (sp).. they will pop back up….just like wack a mole (poser)

  7. @50 Damn, I knew someone would have the answer. Thanks, ex-PH2. Now lemme get out my stone tablet and scribe and write that down, ’cause I’ll never remember it.

    #48 YatYas: some family trees don’t have branches.

    So he never claimed to be a Coastie…why aren’t our Semper Paratus bretheren not rising up in righteous anger to protest that omission? An obvious oversight on his part, he needs to rewrite his fairy tale a bit.

  8. Instead of Rolling Thunder, perhaps he should call himself Failing Skies.

    In August 1945, the US didn’t drop the A-Bomb on Japan, it dropped Christopher Tirao.

  9. So where do I turn in my military records?

    With heroes like him I should just run in shame.

    He is an Army of One. The rest of us can go home.

  10. This guy is out of his fucking mind. Must spend his free time sucking on car exhaust pipes…

  11. Polly Shore’s movie “In The Army Now” is a more acurate depiction of Military service than this guy is.

  12. I sent this ass-clown a personal invitation through his contacts to come defend himself on this blog. He’ll show up but he will be so secret squirrel that no one will see him. The ” Allen Aho ” f/b account is still active & he is communicating from there. He is also activating his Rolling Thunder account long enough to send messages & then de-activating. The mighty secret squirrel of face book thinks he’s slick.

  13. Well I got a reply back from Rolling bullshit.. He blocked me on the Aho account..hehehe, That has a ring to it don’t ya think.. The Aho blocks me on the Aho account..lmaoooo

  14. Allen Aho

    50 minutes agoScott
    Your more than welcome to join in on the conversation about your lies Christopher Tirao . We would love to hear what you have to say in your defense boy.Come on, your the Billy bad ass on the block. so lets see what a secret squirrel bad ass like you has to say. you have officially been called out ! ” No glory in Stolen Valor “.
    You can no longer message Allen Aho. Learn more.

  16. Can’t really help, after reading the whole dossier at “Stolen Valor”, if this soup sandwich is just primarily mentally incapacitated! He needs to be locked away forever. He sounds like he is a danger to society.

    1. The Turd told me off on line when I called him on being a FAKE…HE WENT BALISTIC…..
      And my spelling sucks he told me…

  21. Damn, he did everything but claim his codename was Agent Orange! (What, no Moon of Endor campaign ribbon?)

  22. Anonymous, let’s don’t dis the Endor campaign! I was a gunner on an “Astro-Amtrac” and it was a total bitch! If it wasn’t for the Millennium Falcon…

  23. @71

    He racked up 3 Star Destroyer kills in his Y-Wing.

    When he said he was USNF… does that stand for “Under Sedation, Nucking Futs”?

  25. That page didn’t last long. 5 mins. of posting by three people & he shut it down.

  26. In Western Massachusetts the USNF stands for the Unitarian Society of Northampton and Florence…based on his comments this guy could easily be a member.

  27. I think he’s more likely a follower of the Church of Blind Onanism International. But that’s just me.

  28. @77 I need some eye wash now, that retina burn is going to sting for a while.

  29. “In addition he is also a scratch golfer, a published poet and a research physicist. If you don’t believe him, just ask his wife-Morgan Fairchild.”

    Whom he has seen naked … and with whom he has slept!
    This guy gives the SNL Lier a run for his money!

  34. And given the fact he’s been putting up/taking down FB pages with curious regularity, that kind of throws out the mentally ill excuse.

  36. Who would create one group after another, make it secret and say it is for veterans??? I smell a rat!

  38. Maybe he went to nam after the war ended with the top secret mission of infiltrating enemy territory and placing spam mail in there mailboxs! Thats totally hardcore man!

  39. I visit this site quite often…mainly for the sheer entertainment value of some of these jokers, but this dude takes the cake. After 21 years of active duty service, I am in awe of his achievements. Seriously though, I am actually a little embarrassed for him, as well as the majority of these folks captured forever on TAH.

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  45. Just saw this guy for the first time. He is unf@cking believable! How does he have the brass to claim all that shit? I mean DAMN! He had me at ‘Nam in ’78! One of the biggest ass clowns I have seen on TAH.

  49. Pingback: This ain't Hell, but you can see it from here » Blog Archive » South Regional Second Round

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